I'm So Gay

Last week while at work I interviewed a black guy from Africa. He was just here to interview for our entry level leasing position. So this was a pretty easy interview for me and I have already in mind a pretty good profile of the kind of person that I typically pass on. I asked my normal interview questions, but his demeanor was a little too light. He kept laughing too much for job interview questions and the thought even crossed my mind during the interview, "if this were a girl sitting here, then I would think that we'd be hitting it off pretty well." The interview finished and I told him that we'd be in touch.

He turned out to be the very persistent kind of applicant. Phone calls came within a few days, and I wanted to just avoid answering his calls or returning them because I already knew that this wasn't someone that we were going to hire. A lot of times people will get the idea and not continue to follow up. Not this guy though. He called Wednesday through Friday of last week and I finally told him in one conversation that we would be following up and that he didn't have to call anymore. So of course when this week started, he called me early Monday morning. I wasn't around for that phone call, but didn't bother returning the call.

Today I felt bad and decided that I should at least let him know that we weren't interested. I thought I was in the clear when I got his voicemail and just had to leave a message. I gave him the my typical speech, "thanks for your time, but we have decided to go with another job applicant. If in the future something does come up, I will be sure to keep you in mind. Feel free to call if you have any questions." I shouldn't have opened that window.

He called while I was out to lunch today and mentioned on the message that he had some questions for me. At this point I felt bad that he had called so much and I owed it to him to at least have a conversation with him as to why we decided to pass on him.

I called back and I could tell that he was in the middle of some kind of interaction, work, lunch, something. This is how our conversation went, to the best of my recollection:

Me: Hi. So what's up? You said you had some questions.
Guy: Hi, thanks for calling me back. I don't normally do this, but I felt like during the interview we had made a pretty good connection, and I'm into it, and I thought you may be too, so I was just wondering if you wanted to hang out sometime.
Me: ...
Me: ...
Me: ...(10-15 seconds pass)
Guy: Hello? Are you there?
Me: Yeah, sorry. Well, uh, I...I don't know. (At this point, I don't really want to just come right out and say that I don't swing that way, but I didn't know how to nicely turn him down.) I live...far from you and I'm moving out of the state soon...wait...what do you mean by "it"?
Guy: Well, I thought we had made a personal connection and I was just...
Me: Into what? What does "it" mean? I'm not sure I understand what you're getting at.
Guy: Oh, nevermind. I must have been mistaken. Sorry.

So how does this happen? I have no idea what it was about our interaction that made him think that I was at all interested like that. But what about me would ever make someone think that I'm anything other than a bastion of virile heterosexuality? I mean my current favorite TV show is So You Think You Can Dance, I'm loving reading New Moon, and I'm totally in love with Edward. And I even saw Mamma Mia on opening night, rather than the Dark Knight which opened the same night.

Just kidding. I'm not that gay.

Too much? Too soon? Have those wounds healed yet?

I keed, I keed!