Monday, February 28, 2011

Viva, Las Vegas!

Nobody took pictures. I'm sure that's appalling to Amy and the rest of the Waltons, but I promise you, it's not that uncommon for a lot of people. We still went, I promise.

Let's see, here's the brief recap: Arrive Friday afternoon to have lunch at Hash House A Go Go (not sure where all the hyphens are in there, so I'll leave it alone). Several of us had chicken and waffles, while two of those several decided not to let the other two know that one plate is probably big enough for three full-sized adults. A couple of the guys had to finish up some work so that afternoon we just kind of hung out in what turned out to be a massive suite on the top floor of the Flamingo.

We slept 8 very comfortably, and it could have probably been about 20-25 pretty comfortably. We went bowling at the Gold Coast Casino which features 60 bowling lanes. I was pretty on from the start, bowling 151 and then 195. While I'm pleased that my bowling is consistent, I'd like to break 200 again really soon. I keep getting on the precipice, but I refuse to go over for some reason.

Dinner that night=pizza=pretty satisfied, for both dinner and breakfast the next day, and maybe a pre-sushi snack the next day. Some people might think that's gross, but I think it's kind of awesome.

Some of the guys hit the dollar blackjack tables, and some of us just kind of wandered back and forth watching the other guys play. Gambling is so funny to me. I can definitely see the appeal, but I get too easily addicted to things, plus I don't think I'm risk averse enough to not do my bank account some pretty serious damage. Looks fun though.

I went for a run on the strip Saturday morning. Know what? Turns out, running the strip at 8am is probably one of my favorite runs. I was going to go out and run 20 minutes out, and then 20 minutes back, but it was so interesting to me that I just kept on going. Ran for an hour which is about 7-8 miles for me. Running the strip in the morning is awesome for the following reasons, A) it's basically empty at 8am, B) there are walkways over all of the roads so you never really have to stop, C) Vegas, for all of the traffic and general dirtiness (especially at night) is actually a pretty darn clean place during the day, and D) there are so many visual sights that it's easy to just look at everything without even realizing you're running. Plus, there are lots of stairs and TONS of other people are out running in the morning. It was just nice, and a good way to tour the interesting parts of the city.

We caught the BYU/SDSU game at the Bellagio sports book. I didn't have the unerring faith that Mike Reid had, but the Cougars pulled it out with a really impressive victory. Hopefully that is a sign of things to come during the Madness to come.

Afterward, I bought Risk (not entirely sure what inspired that) and we played a couple of games back at the hotel. None of us could really remember how the setup, or how exactly to play, so our first game was unusually short and our second game was unusually long, but it was a lot of fun. Dave was the winner* of Game 1 and I was the Game 2 winner*. We took a break in Game 2 to get sushi at one of our favorite places. It was wonderful, but as is always the case with these all-you-can-eat places, I had WAY too much sushi. It was all good stuff this time, fortunately, but just too much.

More than anything, I just love my friends. My guy friends from home are just awesome and funny, and more loyal than you could ever imagine. They're smart, fun, and just good-hearted people. I think I am the luckiest person to have the people that are in my life.

*Games 1 & 2 can only loosely be called Risk since the variations involved created a lot of distortion from the true version.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Gender Differences

"Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal, and eternal identity and purpose."
That comes from the Proclamation to the World on the Family put out by the Church 15 years ago. While in California, I had an interesting conversation with Amy about some of the work I'm doing up here. I was listening to some interviews and some people expressed dismay over why the Church doesn't do more to support the Girl Scouts like it does the Boy Scouts. (Turns out, it has a lot to do with the platforms that the Girls Scouts supports, namely that it is an advocate of same-sex political positions. I didn't know that when we were talking about it then, however. I only just found that out a second ago after looking it up.)

Anyway, the conversation turned toward how some people were upset about how the Girl Scouts don't offer all the same activities and program that the Boy Scouts do, and there is something wrong with that. Amy was advocating that there are some really great things about being female, but that it's a hard concept to explain to some people, and particularly those with different values, namely, equality in every respect of the world at the expense of disregarding those unique characteristics .

I like that line from the Proclamation on the Family. I think that was part of the problem with Sister Julie Beck's talk in conference a few years ago about Mothers Who Know. People didn't like how much it pigeon-holed women into the role of mothers. I don't really want to get into the particulars of that talk, however.

I mention all of this because I came across this article on ESPN about a young man who chose not to wrestle a young woman in the state championship. I'm assuming that the guilty parties misspoke when they were trying to explain their reasoning, or maybe they've just been misrepresented by the writer. The writer points out that if it was to preserve the girl's safety, then they are flawed in their reasoning. This is what the father of the boy said about the incident:
"We believe in the elevation and respect of woman," the father told the Des Moines Register, "and we don't think that wrestling a woman is the right thing to do. Body slamming and takedowns -- full contact sport is not how to do that."
I think that's a different point than what Reilly was getting at. There are some fundamental differences between men and women. This wasn't about discrediting a woman's wrestling abilities, or whether she can take a beating, but it seems more just about wanting to preserve the sanctity of a woman by not competing against her in what is intended to be a violent sport.

I don't really have the time now to fully articulate my thoughts, but I'm just going to let that sit and percolate with you for a bit. This is mostly about how people pass judgment on others assuming that they are operating from the same value systems as their own. This point is central to the debate about same-sex issues. and this is also at the heart of this instance as well.

Just thinking out loud.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Home Is Wherever I'm With You

Have you guys seen this?

Adorable, right? One of my old roommates would play that song every night. Every night. I miss that guy.

Here's the recap:

Home was quite a whirlwind trip. Amy got her dress. Somehow I got a tuxedo. We didn't find ties, but I think we've got a potential source. There were lots of games, fittings, and Mexican Coca Cola. I ran 8 miles on Saturday and it was just PERFECT outside. Just perfect. I can't believe how much I love running down there. I'm excited for running season to come up again. Yup, I'm there. The weather was cool, it rained a lot on our drive down, and a little while we were there, but in spite of not being typical Southern California weather, it was still better than everything that was had here in Utah. I love the Reids. My dad and his wife were incredibly generous with everything over the weekend. My mom is a sweetheart. And I think I want to steal Mason. And Kathryn (sp?) too. So cute. And the boys, Ryan and Tyler. Those little guys are just fun. Ryan has achieved self-awareness and now gets embarrassed about things. My niece is also really cute. Maybe just all kids are cute.

Vegas is coming up this weekend, and Amy has her bridal shower.

If you know of anyone that wants us to move into their place for freezies, we're all ears. Or if we could even just be pointed to a decent place in Pleasant Grove, that would be nice too. Or anywhere for that matter. That's been kind of an issue lately. That's all for now. Much love.

Friday, February 18, 2011

Coming Home

This song seems appropriate for this weekend:

This morning I was doing some reading and marveling to myself how amazing language is. The thought came up as I was reading about stress and how it affects our physiology blah blah blah, but I noticed a missing quotation mark, and it just blew my mind - not only can someone whom I've never met communicate to me really complex ideas, but if that person happens to be a good writer, I can also understand the nuances, subtleties, tones, and the like with every well-placed punctuation mark or correctly chosen word. It's amazing, isn't it?

You know what else is nice? I could not be one iota/unit/quantity/bit/other-vague-term-of-measurement more content with my situation in life. I have an amazing fiancee, single friends, couple friends, married friends, family, prospective family and I just can't believe how fortunate I am to have the people I know in my life. I have awesome work/school/professional opportunities. There is just a lot to be grateful for and excited about.

Tell the world I'm coming home.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Gas Is Expensive



I wonder when the rising cost of gasoline will start to become an issue again, and how President Obama will react to the surge in prices. Some of this may have to do with the furious printing being done by the US Treasury. I wonder if any of this has to do with the sudden instability in Egypt and what that is doing about speculation as it relates to the unrest that is generally occurring in the Middle East. President Bush opened up the moratorium on drilling and gases prices responded quickly, but will Obama do the same? Or will he push for the alternative energy that he's so fond of? Anyway, found it on this pretty cool website, here.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

What Time Is It? Valentime's!

When I'm conducting quorum meetings, I'll usually ask a introductory question to have everyone kind of warm up a bit and so people can just hear individuals share something in the quorum. This past Sunday I asked them about their favorite Valentine's day memories. I was really surprised that so many of the guys were so negative in their perspectives about el dia de San Valentin. Want to know my feelings on the day? Go here, here, or here, if you had any questions about my feelings on it. Or read the rest of this post.

The lamest response, "I don't like being told/feeling obligated to have a day to tell someone that I love them," or some other variation on that line. It is such a cop-out. Such a cop-out. Oh, you know what else I hate? Christmas. I hate that someone made up a day to celebrate the birth of the Savior. We should just remember it every day, and celebrate it everyday. Right? I told Amy about what the guys were saying and she had the same exact response. I just love her.

Anyway, it's just good to have time set aside to celebrate what is probably the most important of all human emotions and expressions. Fortunately, I'm pretty well practiced in expressing my feelings and taking advantage of Valentine's day for just such expressions.

Yesterday was nice. It came together rather quickly once I finally decided on my plan, but it required me running around from the minute my class was done up until the time that the plans actually came to fruition. It included stops at Costco, Macey's, Robert's, Hallmark, and the mall. It required marinating, baking, and grilling. And it ended all smiles. (We even dropped by the dance that our stake put on for a little bit. I just love that Amy is so fun that way. Last night I finally realized, when she mentioned it, that we'll need to take full advantage of chaperoning the youth dances when we're in the family ward. Can't wait.)

An aside: I can't tell you how much I love my grill. It's got so much space, it cooks (mostly) evenly, and it's just so easy compared to a charcoal grill. You can't beat the ease and clean up of the gas grill. Merry Christmas to me! And whomever else is the beneficiary of my recently acquired grill skills. The featured recipe? Stole this one from a friend.

Know what else is fun? I'm sure it's the same everywhere, but it's just fun to see so many guys out and about getting flowers. In just about every car that I was driving by, some guy was carting some amount of flowers along with him. Just great.

Well that is all. I hope you all took advantage of Valentine's day.

Xoxo! And I still just love this clip:

Friday, February 11, 2011

One Man's Struggle To Take It Easy

(Link) View more Ferris Buellers Day Off Sound Clips and Matthew Broderick Sound Clips
Did you know that's the tagline (post title) for Ferris Bueller's Day Off? Pretty clever, isn't it? That is easily one of my favorite movies and the last time I saw it is one year and one week ago from tomorrow. It was my first date with Amy.

It's so crazy to me how quickly things move and how much time unfolds right in front of my own eyes. A year ago we first started going out, and in five weeks we'll be getting married. Crazy.

We went to our last ward temple night in this ward yesterday at the Mt. Timpanogas temple, and it was so fun to see the temple where we're going to be shooting our bridals and groomals in a couple weeks, and in just over a month, where we'll actually be getting married.

I just can't believe how close it is.

Amy already has a buyer for her contract, and I just posted mine this morning. There's still a good amount of stuff to figure out, but I think we've been able to make good steady progress with everything as D-day approaches. Next weekend we'll be in California picking up her dress, the following weekend I'll be in Vegas with my buddies, 5 weeks we'll be married, and 10 years later we'll have a house and 4.5 children.

Not really, but it just feels like it's moving that way. Some other wedding related items:
  • Invitations started going out yesterday.
  • We picked out our first song to dance to as husband and wife.
  • Dress comes next week.
  • Maybe we'll have ties next week.
  • Hopefully we'll have reception food picked out this weekend.
  • I want to sign a contract for our new place next week.
It's crazy how many things there are still to do, but it's still fun figuring all of it out. It really is just an exciting time.

This was a finalist in the first dance song, but still lost out. I really like it though. Have a great weekend, dear ones.

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Reagan at 100

Maybe you didn't know this, but Ronald Reagan was born 100 years ago over the weekend. All over conservative outlets they have been celebrating him and sharing thoughts of him, that kind of thing. You know what are some of my favorite things to read? Personal anecdotes of Reagan. He's so funny and humane, just so generally interested in improving the human condition. Jay Nordlinger wrote an essay when he passed away in 2004, and he related this bit:
If I hadn’t liked Reagan so much, as a man, would I have swung around to his views? Probably—but it would have taken longer. There was his humor, his “security in his own skin,” as everyone said. People wanted him to be embarrassed by his acting career, especially his role in Bedtime for Bonzo, in which he played alongside a chimp. But Reagan wasn’t the least embarrassed. Someone gave him a still from that picture to sign—Reagan with Bonzo. He wrote,“I’m the one with the watch.”
Don't you just love that? There are tons of stories like that about him. I need to read another biography on him. So should you.

Monday, February 7, 2011

Relationship Cooing

Amy and I hit one year since we first went out, one year ago from last Saturday. Pretty crazy, right? I have never been in such a stable and consistently good relationship. I guess that makes sense or else I probably would have been engaged before. We've had some stormy spots, but otherwise it has really been smooth sailing. No one has ever made me feel so secure in a relationship.

This time of year is really funny to me. People have some time to finally develop some friendships and people know each other well enough that they start dating and getting cozy with each other. Obviously Amy and I started getting acquainted at this point last year, but we've been able to see some other couples emerge in the last little bit as well.

One of my roommates is actually part of one of these couples, and I guess I'm running some risk because sometimes his girlfriend drops by here, but these aren't things I wouldn't shy away from telling her anyway, so here goes. Knowing them separately, I would have never really thought to pair them together, not that they're opposites, but I just never really pictured that one happening. Yesterday they spent most of the afternoon and then evening on our bar couch that's now our living room couch, and it was actually really kind of adorable. They talk and laugh a lot together, and it made me think of cooing.

I couldn't hear anything that they were actually saying from my room, but I could hear the tone of it and it was really just warm and sweet. There's a type of cooing that couples do when they're together that really illustrates a lot about the state of the relationship. They sit close together and kind of laugh and tease, but they can also sit quietly and feel comfortable enough that they'll start falling asleep together. We went out with another couple on Friday night and they have some really similar banter. We've known the girl for awhile, and she's really one of our very favorite people up here. It's just really fun because I think I've gotten into that place where I just want the whole world to start dating and be in relationships so that we can hang out with them.

I love what I have with Amy. Yesterday in stake conference I was thinking about confirmations and such about her, our relationship, and our engagement. I never really actively sought out a spiritual confirmation, but just that I would be generally inspired and in tune with my own feelings and whether this would be a good and right relationship for me to pursue, and I've just never had any real doubts about her or about how good things have been with her.

Anyway, I just hope that our own cooing persists and that people can look at us and see what it is that they'd like to see in their own lives.

Friday, February 4, 2011

Digital Love

It's kind of funny to me sometimes when I realize how different musical tastes can be between people. It really says a lot about a person's personality, doesn't it? So I wonder what it says about mine when I was putting together the beginnings of a wedding playlist and I started thinking, "you know what I can't believe I don't have? a west or east coast hip hop mix!" Then I was driving around with my roommate last night and just kind of laughing to myself about how different his tastes are from mine.

I like to think I'm pretty varied on what I'll listen to. My go-to as a teen was punk music, just loved that stuff to death. And I still really like it now, but I also like a lot of rap/hippity-hop, but I'm pretty good when it comes to 80s-90s music too. Last month I got a bunch of classic rock stuff too. Or pop. Most anything, for that matter, but I've never really attempted to develop a taste for country music, but I bet with the right tutelage, I could be open to that one as well.

I didn't mean to get into all of that.

There's a lot of things to feel be excited about: upcoming trips, tonight's men's volleyball game, my thesis work (what?!), , the Super Bowl, wedding stuff. It's all fun stuff. And the weekend. It's here! Have a good one, y'all!



(One of the featured songs at the reception. I just kinda dig on it. It's upbeat and fun.)

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Using Time Wisely

Usually that is not the case for me. I feel like I do a great job of just doing filler items. This last week though, I have been incredibly productive:
  • Prepared and taught what will probably be my final lesson in this ward and as a YSA, generally.
  • Home taught more than 10 different people.
  • Ran more than 30 miles in about 6 days.
  • Finally got moving again on my thesis and sent off my latest draft to my committee chairperson.
  • Helped move a girl in my ward.
  • Moved two sets of washers and dryers.
  • Finished a book.
  • Started eating super healthy again (for me at least). Two salads on consecutive days!
It's kind of funny to me how much I can get done when Amy is not around. And I wouldn't even necessarily say that it's because of Amy that I don't always get those things done, but I would say that it's because of her that I wanted to get them all taken care of before she came back.

It really is a great feeling to feel on top of things. This week really was the first week of good progress on my thesis since probably before the holidays. It's amazing how other things can just take over my life.

Well, she's back now, and I couldn't be happier, but I sure would love if I could merge productive me from this past week to getting-ready-for-marriage me that's been here for the last little bit. We'll see how that goes.

Monday, January 31, 2011

Love My People


So it's my best friend's beautiful wife's (Caitlin) Smurfday today and for some reason my feelings are closer to the surface about my loved ones today. Isn't she so pretty?

Here are five things that I just love about Caitlin:
  1. Her insatiable hunger for games. Really. It's like a meth addict type addiction for her. It's unreal.
  2. Her tendency towards a 10-year old type diet because I think I trend that way too. I know I do. She just loves treats and it's kind of awesome.
  3. She is one of the wittiest girls I know.
  4. She totally gets her husband's humor, and everyone does because he's funny, but she just rolls her eyes at it a lot of the time and I think that in itself is funny.
  5. She makes my best friend a much better man than he could ever be without her.
This morning I started scrolling through blogs of my friends and Amy's family, and I was really kind of overwhelmed with how much I love all of these people. I am excited to have some time in a couple weekends with Mary and Scott and Elisha and the kids. I am so excited to head back home this month, even if it's only a few days. I'm super excited to hang out with all of my buddies at the end of the month for a bachelor party. And one of the best parts about getting married next month is having all of my favorite people in one location to celebrate with Amy and I.

There's no greater satisfaction for me than the people in my life. Happy birthday, Caitlin!

(You too, Mike. You didn't get a blog shout-out, but I still want to go out to just a Silva and Mike Reid lunch this week, albeit, a couple weeks late.)

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Here We Go, Cougars

I'm a lot a bit disappointed about tonight. I bought tickets to the BYU v. SDSU game weeks ago in anticipation of this game. Our very own #9 team is hosting a #6 team and winner assumes the top position in the conference? Yes, please.

Only I realized last week that I have to teach a class tonight. So we gave away our tickets to Amy's brother and sister-in-law. Shame. I also walked past Jimmer on campus the other day. Nobody else really seemed to notice him. Funny how that works, right? I wanted to approach him because it would be cool to say when he gets to the NBA, I met that kid way back when...

Maybe some day.

Other sports comments:
  • The Angels traded for Vernon Wells over the weekend. Some of my friends are really sour on the trade, but I think this is something that actually returns them to prominence. I'm behind the trade 100%. They complain about the contract, but I applaud the acquisition of a legitimate 3 or 4 hitter in the lineup. How do they not realize that with just that move alone the Angels actually become a threat with their lineup again?
  • I'm a little bit in love with Aaron Rodgers. Is it because he spells his last name with a "d"? Yes, a little. But mostly it's just that the guy has had to take a pretty circuitous route to the NFL. He received zero scholarships out of high school, but still found his way to a good program. He made them legitimate, and then he had to suffer in agony while every camera was trained on him as teams passed over him in the NFL draft. He had to sit behind resident d-bag Brett Favre for several years before finally getting his shot as a staring QB in the NFL, and now there's no denying that he's one of the elite QBs. But what is it that makes him so endearing? I think it's the Facebook fan page dedicated to his TD celebration.
I am very excited for this year's Super Bowl. I'm a little bit dead inside because I can't get to tonight's basketball game. But it's no big deal. My teams are rockin' generally, and in the sport where my team faded off awhile, there is still someone awesome to root for.

Let's go Cougars and Packers.

Friday, January 21, 2011

Friday Round-Up

I know I've done this before, and my readers don't really follow current events or politics as much as I'd like y'all to, but here are some recommendations for some people around the web that you might, possibly, perhaps like to read some more from sometime:
  • Jay Nordlinger - this is my guy. I quote him almost every time I have a post on here. He's a genuine person, conservative in his politics, and just a wonderful human being. I even wrote him one time about one of his columns and he actually responded to me. Isn't that cool? It was brief, but still. Anyway, check him out on National Review.
  • Jeff Jacoby - Only in the last several months to year have I really started following this guy. Now I get his weekly email that includes his column. He writes for he Boston Globe, but he's got a wonderfully sensible take on just about everything. And he writes about interesting things, but they aren't limited to just your usual current events stuff.
  • James Taranto - he writes for the Wall Street Journal. He's very quippy, Has just a great take on politics, very grounded. His (usually) daily piece is called Best of the Web Today.
  • David Brooks - writes for the NY Times. I used to follow him a lot more than I do now. My less frequent reading of him doesn't owe to anything in particular. He's mostly a moderate writer, but he has a great take that's a slight different spin on things. Good stuff.
  • Michael Barone - writes for the Washington Examiner which is by and large, a conservative newspaper. He's a great political analyst and crunches numbers hard, but gives great, very readable insights.
There are a number of others who are good too - Charles Krauthammer, Byron York, Thomas Sowell, among others. They're worth reading. Great commentary.

And I leave you with this Friday song. Not sure why I'm so into it, but it's been my jam this week.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Morning Thoughts About Benevolent Sexism

So everyone knows what hostile sexism is - it's what you typically think of when it comes to sexism generally. Benevolent sexism is a different strand. It is the kind that causes men to open doors, pay for meals, those kinds of things. It's the nice variety. Normally it's accompanied by a paternalistic, talking-down-to kind of patronizing. It can point to really negative behavioral traits, but generally I think it's just being nice, and it's mostly welcome.

Mostly.

Anyway, I started thinking about this on the bus this morning. Actually, I've been thinking about it every time lately on the morning bus ride to Salt Lake because the bus has been unusually full in the last little while. So many people are getting on to ride, in fact, that at least a few people (sometimes many) are left without seats for the 45 minute ride and are left to stand in the aisle. Men will usually get up and allow women to sit in their places, and this morning one man even went so far as to ask some inattentive young man to give up his seat for a woman that was standing in front of him.

It kind of bothered me a little, and here's why: everyone on that bus is on his or her way up to Salt Lake, and it's an early hour, and it requires waiting outside in the cold, 12 degrees this morning to be exact. I used to drive from my place out to a later exit so that I wouldn't have to stay on the bus as long, but with the overcrowding I've taken to getting up earlier to get on at an earlier stop so that I can get my own seat and not have to stand. This is important to me just because I depend on being seated so that I can get a good 30-40 minute nap on the bus before getting to work. I get up earlier and will wait longer if it means I can get a seat. Anyone else can do the same.

I'm not opposed to giving up my seat to a woman. I've done it a few times on the way back to Utah County without complaint or hesitation. I don't mind when everyone has the same opportunity for the same seats, but there is something that bothers me when anyone else can do what I do and just get up a little earlier and make sure you get on the bus before it fills up. I think that taking more time out of my day and getting up earlier is a cost to bear, and with that cost, I expect to have a seat. Is that unreasonable?

In any case, I mostly remove the need to give up my seat by going to the very back of the bus and reserving for myself a window seat. Turns out people won't ask you to get up if it's really inconvenient to get to your seat. And that is the benefit to being observant.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

How to Parent

Did anyone see the article, Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior, last week? Mona Charen over at NRO has a response to the article that you can find here. As you might imagine, the original article is pretty harsh in its tone, the parenting style very brash and demanding. Let me give you some excerpts:
What Chinese parents understand is that nothing is fun until you're good at it. To get good at anything you have to work, and children on their own never want to work, which is why it is crucial to override their preferences. This often requires fortitude on the part of the parents because the child will resist; things are always hardest at the beginning, which is where Western parents tend to give up. But if done properly, the Chinese strategy produces a virtuous circle. Tenacious practice, practice, practice is crucial for excellence; rote repetition is underrated in America. Once a child starts to excel at something—whether it's math, piano, pitching or ballet—he or she gets praise, admiration and satisfaction. This builds confidence and makes the once not-fun activity fun. This in turn makes it easier for the parent to get the child to work even more...

The fact is that Chinese parents can do things that would seem unimaginable—even legally actionable—to Westerners. Chinese mothers can say to their daughters, "Hey fatty—lose some weight." By contrast, Western parents have to tiptoe around the issue, talking in terms of "health" and never ever mentioning the f-word, and their kids still end up in therapy for eating disorders and negative self-image. (I also once heard a Western father toast his adult daughter by calling her "beautiful and incredibly competent." She later told me that made her feel like garbage.)

Chinese parents can order their kids to get straight As. Western parents can only ask their kids to try their best. Chinese parents can say, "You're lazy. All your classmates are getting ahead of you." By contrast, Western parents have to struggle with their own conflicted feelings about achievement, and try to persuade themselves that they're not disappointed about how their kids turned out...

I've noticed that Western parents are extremely anxious about their children's self-esteem. They worry about how their children will feel if they fail at something, and they constantly try to reassure their children about how good they are notwithstanding a mediocre performance on a test or at a recital. In other words, Western parents are concerned about their children's psyches. Chinese parents aren't. They assume strength, not fragility, and as a result they behave very differently.
There were over 4,000 comments to the article, which is a record for the WSJ. It elicited a lot of strong feelings from parents.

But maybe not as negative in their reactions as you might expect. Charen points out, "The tiger mothers may overdo it a bit — but let’s face it, many American parents are too reluctant to demand work that isn’t “fun” and too ready to believe that our children have something to teach us rather than the other way around."

Admittedly, I don't know anything about parenting from my own experience. I can only conjecture about what I would do or how I might react given certain situations, but I don't know what kind of temperament my kids will have, or how even my own response while actually in that role of parent. However, I think there is some merit to what the author mentions.

There is such a strong push in our society to protect and boost self-esteem, but as Chua points out, depression, anxiety, and other related disorders run rampant, and maybe more now than ever before in spite of our best efforts to coddle and protect. I think there is some sense to her assertion that it's good to assume strength and not fragility. Her harsh manner is very likely not the best method for raising children, but the tendency to be too soft and too lenient probably overrides much too often. As members of the Church, if we have those expectations when it comes to morality, would it be that much of a stretch to have similar expectations in other arenas of life?

Just some thoughts while I'm waiting for our server to get back online.

Getting the Itch

I took another few weeks off of running over Christmas and the holidays. It was actually a welcome break. My left arch had been getting sore. I had gotten a little sick, so I'm not sure if running would have just prolonged that cold anyway. It made sense.

But I've been running again the last few days and I can't believe the difference. I sleep better. I have more energy. I'm happier. And the second I even run a few miles after a break like that, I'm automatically several pounds lighter. It's amazing the difference. The best part, though, is that I just love it. It gives me time to think. I can let my legs work and my mind wander.

So it's probably little wonder why I'm looking forward to training for another marathon this summer. I'm thinking the Deseret News one in Salt Lake on Saturday, July 23rd. It starts crazy early to beat the heat - 5:30am. Training for that would start right after the wedding. And if our open house in California doesn't conflict, I'd like to run the Thanksgiving Point half marathon at the end of April. One more? The Dirty Dash is returning to Utah, this time just a 5k on June 4th. Registration for that one right now is $35 until 2/20.

Who is with me?

Friday, January 14, 2011

A Quick Update

The wedding planning is going. Amy is a machine when it comes to getting that stuff done, and we're making good progress, but there's still a lot to do. Turns out that planning a party for a couple hundred friends and family members, a honeymoon to immediately follow, then another trip up to Vancouver the following week, and another one to California about a month later requires a lot of details. And that's in addition to the merging of lives. Who knew, right? Clearly not me. I always used to get so annoyed with engaged couples who would disappear before they got married and then they come back around and want to hang out after being married for a month or few, but now I understand how that goes. Put all of that on top of work, school, and calling stuff and it's pretty hectic these days.

Our schedule from the day of our wedding to when we leave on our honeymoon to coming back and then heading straight back up to Canada will be at break neck pace, but it looks like we'll get some good time in with all the important players and in the right places. I'm really happy about that.

It's amazing how real life becomes while I'm going through this whole process. I've had various thoughts and some moments of concern this week about how well all of this will go - will I be able to find gainful employment following school with meaningful pay? can we find a place that's reasonable in its costs, but that we're still happy with? will we be able to start a family on the time table that we'd like? those things - but what's been really nice has been how supportive Amy is through everything, but just as helpful has been staying up with scripture study and prayer.

I think I'll get to this point more over the weekend, but it's important to stay connected. I think maybe one of the most important things, staying connected to loved ones, to Heavenly Father. I've had a lot of thoughts about that this week. I'll get back to that later.

Anyway, back to work. This song is probably not appropriate given the tone that the post is ending with, but I just love these beats. Have a great weekend, dear ones.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

The Present Madness

I trust that you heard about the shootings over the weekend, right? Down in Tuscon, a congresswoman, federal judge, and several other people were shot and killed by a gunman. Rep. Giffords (D) is in critical condition, but apparently she is improving. There's a lot of controversy being stirred up by various news sources about how this was a politically motivated shooting that occurred because of the climate that's being fostered by the right. Where was this kind of talk last year when that guy opened-fire at Ft. Hood and it actually was a politically motivated shooting? He was a Muslim extremist, but the call was for everyone to calm down and look at it rationally. Now people are jumping on the Tea Party and saying that this is somehow tied to Sarah Palin.

How is that even remotely the case? When does anyone on the right EVER advocate any sort of violence whatsoever? Absurd. All of this, in fact, obscures the real issue. Mona Charen mentions it briefly in this piece here. The most obvious explanation for what happened over the weekend was that this guy was a paranoid schizophrenic who had a grudge against the congresswoman. Schizophrenia was what afflicted John Lennon's killer, Ronald Reagan's attempted assassin, and the kid who went into a grocery store in Irvine several years ago with a samurai sword. It afflicts more men than women, and typically sets in during a person's 20s. We talked about it at length yesterday in my Biological Psych class.

Anyway, my guy, Jay Nordlinger, had this to say about it:

The shooting in Arizona has nothing to do with politics. Nothing to do with Republicans, nothing to do with conservatism. It has nothing to do with the Tea Party, Sarah Palin, you, or me. From what we know, a young psychotic got it into his psychotic head that he would shoot the local congressman, who happened to have a “D.” after her name, rather than an “R.” But the goons and ghouls have pretended that the Republicans spurred this.

And here we are, talking about the massacre and the Republicans, the massacre and national politics, as though there were any connection between these things.

A psychotic described by his classmates as a left-wing pothead shoots a bunch of people. And in the dock is that famous left-wing pothead Sarah Palin. Great, just great. May I pose a question? If the wounded congressman were a Republican instead of a Democrat -- I believe the dead judge was a Republican -- would we be having a discussion about the massacre and national politics? Would anchormen be running to the scene of the crime?

Jeff Danziger has drawn another odious cartoon, the kind he has long specialized in: Out of a steaming teapot arises an assassin. Get it? The Tea Party. Cool! That’s the way the likes of Danziger want it to be, and practically need it to be. That’s the way they wish it were -- no matter what the reality.

I am speaking of the following attitude: A right-winger, instead of a Communist, should have shot Kennedy. A right-winger, instead of a Palestinian immigrant, should have shot Bobby. A right-winger -- a Tea Partier! -- instead of a young, untreated schizo, should have shot Giffords and those others. I believe that is the attitude on display in that cartoon, and elsewhere.

To say it once more, the Left has kind of won: because we are having a discussion about the Arizona shooting and Republicanism, the Arizona shooting and Sarah Palin, which is not much different from having a discussion about the Arizona shooting and, oh, I don’t know: the price of eggs in Dakar.

Chances are, the Arizona massacre will hurt the Republican party and the Tea Party, stopping or slowing their momentum. Because the Left, “respectable” and not, has, I believe, succeeded in associating the massacre in the public mind with the “Right.” A “veteran Democratic operative” told Politico that President Obama and his team “need to deftly pin this on the Tea Partiers.” Oh, I’m not sure they have to be so deft about it. The Danziger-Krugman way will probably work just fine.

What the irresponsible Left has done in this instance -- in its exploitation of a massacre -- is so low, so foul, so disgusting, I barely have the words. I mean, turn Paul Wellstone’s funeral into a political rally if you want to. But this? As I said on the Bennett radio show, I’m not a blushing violet, and I know that politics is rough. But to pretend that a murder spree by a psychotic has something to do with those of us who oppose the Democrats’ health legislation and other measures -- this is beyond the pale, way beyond it.

I’ve said it before: There are angels and demons on both the right and the left. Neither side has a monopoly on virtue, or its opposite. I’ve made some people chuckle by saying, “Most of the worst people I have known have been on the right. Why? Because I have known so many people on the right! My jobs have seen to that.” I know a lot of angels and demons -- of different political stripes.

But the Left’s reaction to this Arizona massacre -- “Mission Accomplished, Sarah Palin,” and all that? Very, very hard to take. It is indeed hard to share a conversation, a political culture, a society, with such people.

Just thought you should know.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

I'm Checkin' In!


I was telling Amy this past Sunday that if I were going to bear my testimony that day in church, it would have been about family history. I think Amy and I are a pretty cool combination when it comes to documentation because she is very visual while I am very verbal, so that means we should have a pretty good family blog.

I think journaling and documenting your own life events is as much family history as doing the grinding work of finding birth and death dates and such, only it's a lot more fun because who doesn't like to talk about themselves in one form or another, right?

Anyway, I think it's importance is illustrated well in the Book of Mormon. That entire book is essentially one family's history, Lehi's. My favorite specific mention of this topic is when Benjamin is speaking to his sons about the scriptures, "were it not for these plates, which contain these records and these commandments, we must have suffered in ignorance, even at this present time, not knowing the mysteries of God" (Mosiah 1:3). In our own way, we have our own experiences to boast of, and ones that should document the mysteries of God as he operates in our lives.

With all of that being said, I think that I'd like to get back to blogging more. I think my blog will serve that function in part, and I think I'll start doing more written accounts of the goings on that we have, but I'll also interject with the other sundry topics that I tend to explore as well.

With that said, I just love this story about Ted Williams (not the HOF'er). This is the original video that was posted yesterday. Check out the view count.


A day later, he has gotten multiple offers for jobs, and it ends up that the one he'll be taking will be with the Cleveland Cavaliers. They have offered him a job, and to help him get back on his feet they are offering to pay the mortgage on a home. What's my favorite part in all of this is the amount of humility that he has, and while it's surely been pressed upon him because of his own poor choices, it is still there nonetheless.

Anyway, here's an interview with him from this afternoon:


I just love this story. So look forward to more blog posts.