Quick Hits

I have a few current events and random items that I wanted to share:

• I think this is something that would do well here in Provo - there is a website dedicated to the sale of your breakup bling - wedding rings, jewelry, other sundries that you got from an ex. The website is called Out of Your Life, and can be found be clicking here.
• I have mentioned this before in some other posts, but people reify environmentalism as religion as much as Christians and Buddhists and Muslisms do their own beliefs. You can't access the Wall Street Journal article anymore unless you're a subscriber, but they did include these points about the Church of Environmentalism -
  

  There is a holy day—Earth Day
  
  There are food taboos. Instead of eating fish on Friday, or avoiding pork, Greens now eat organic foods and many are moving towards eating only locally grown foods.
  
  There is no prayer, but there are self-sacrificing rituals that are not particularly useful, such as recycling. Recycling paper to save trees, for example, makes no sense since the effect will be to reduce the number of trees planted in the long run.
  
  Belief systems are embraced with no logical basis. For example, environmentalists almost universally believe in the dangers of global warming but also reject the best solution to the problem, which is nuclear power. These two beliefs co-exist based on faith, not reason.
  
  There are no temples, but there are sacred structures. As I walk around the Emory campus, I am continually confronted with recycling bins, and instead of one trash can I am faced with several for different sorts of trash. Universities are centers of the environmental religion, and such structures are increasingly common. While people have worshipped many things, we may be the first to build shrines to garbage.
  
  Environmentalism is a proselytizing religion. Skeptics are not merely people unconvinced by the evidence: They are treated as evil sinners. I probably would not write this article if I did not have tenure."

• Regarding Socialism, Ludwig Von Mises said:

  "The champions of socialism call themselves progressives, but they recommend a system which is characterized by rigid observance of routine and by a resistance to every kind of improvement. They call themselves liberals, but they are intent upon abolishing liberty. They call themselves democrats, but they yearn for dictatorship. They call themselves revolutionaries, but they want to make the government omnipotent. They promise the blessings of the Garden of Eden, but they plan to transform the world into a gigantic post office. Every man but a subordinate clerk in a bureau. What an alluring utopia! What a noble cause to fight!
  
  Against all this frenzy of agitation there is but one weapon available: reason. Just common sense is needed to prevent man from falling prey to illusory fantasies and empty catchwords."

• Jay Nordlinger has been writing journals from a human rights conference that he has been attending in Oslo, Norway, (access this one and others by clicking here) and it's amazing the kinds of stories that he's relaying. Not the good kind, but the kind that make you feel like you have been living under a rock because you never ever hear about these kinds of stories in the mainstream media, and it's a tragedy. A couple of them:

  Sophal Ear, an American, is a professor at the U.S. Naval Postgraduate School. He was almost a casualty of the Cambodian holocaust. He tells us the story of his family, using photos: We see his mom and his dad, young and in love. Life in Cambodia was pretty good, envied and copied by others in Asia. Then the Khmer Rouge came to power, with their diplomas from Paris. They remade Cambodian society, killing a quarter of the population in the process. Ear’s father was one of the victims. The rest of the family managed to escape to Vietnam.
  
  The Communists wanted to create an “agrarian utopia,” Ear says. “You know the John Lennon song ‘Imagine’? ‘Imagine no possessions, no religion’? That’s what it was like in Cambodia. The only thing people had was a spoon, for eating the daily pourridge. And that pourridge was grossly insufficient for the work they were made to do in the fields.”
  
  I don’t believe I have ever heard the John Lennon song cited negatively. It is thrilling.
  
  Ear mentions that Pol Pot died untouched, in his bed, at an advanced age -- which is slightly annoying.
  
  He also talks about Tuol Sleng, the school that was turned into a torture center. Some 16,000 people were tortured to death; twelve are known to have survived. I find that a stunning statistic -- twelve.
  
  We see a sign listing the rules of Tuol Sleng: It says that, when you are tortured, you cannot cry out. We see photos of boys who are deemed enemies of the state. They have numbers pinned to their skin -- that is, the pins go through their skin, as though it were a shirt. I cannot look at the photos.
  
  But worse, possibly worse? Ear reminds us of all the Western intellectuals who loved -- loved, loved, loved -- the Khmer Rouge. Many of them were in my hometown of Ann Arbor, Mich. Ear shows us pictures of the “Kampuchea Conference” that took place in Stockholm, in 1979. Stockholm is not very far from here. The purpose of the conference was to promote the restoration of the Khmer Rouge to power. Jan Myrdal was the keynote speaker -- the famous intellectual who is the son of Gunnar and Alva. Ear also quotes Noam Chomsky, others. Chomsky is still making moral and political pronouncements, and so is Myrdal.
  
  Being on the left means never having to say you’re sorry. They just glide on . . .
  

  And another:

  Like Kang, Marina Nemat has written a book: Prisoner of Tehran: One Woman’s Story of Survival Inside an Iranian Prison. That prison was one of the most notorious in the world: Evin. A place of darkness and sadism -- unrelenting sadism. Evin is the symbol of the Khomeinist revolution, really.
  
  At the podium, Nemat says, “It is an emotional experience for me to be here. Hearing all these stories” -- the testimonies of other former prisoners -- “I feel energized.” Nemat is going on from Oslo to do a European speaking tour. “Thank you for reenergizing me.”
  
  She was only a teenager when she was a political prisoner. And there have been thousands of teenage political prisoners since the revolution triumphed in 1979, she says. “This situation has been going on for 30 years. It is going on today.” She comments on the pictures of Cambodia that Sophal Ear has shown us. The torture chamber reminded her of what she saw in Evin. Chains tied to bed legs and so on. She says, in essence, “You’ve seen one torture chamber, you’ve seen them all.”
  
  She also describes a visit to Auschwitz she had. During that visit, she saw a great pile of shoes, taken from the victims. “And that made me wonder, What did they do with our shoes?” She remembers the shoes she went in with: “They were Puma running shoes, white with red lines on the sides.” What did they do with our shoes?
  
  She tells her story simply, plainly, matter-of-factly. She was “just a normal girl” who rode her bike in the streets and wanted to become a doctor. Her father was a ballroom-dancing instructor; her mother was a hairdresser. The family was Catholic. She was 13 when the calamity of the revolution struck.
  
  At 16 -- this took unbelievable nerve -- she asked her calculus teacher to teach calculus instead of the Islamist propaganda of the regime.
  
  She was arrested in the middle of the night, and blindfolded upon arrival at Evin. This is standard operating procedure. And then she was tortured. She does not go into details, here in the Christiania Theater. “They are in my book.” She was told that they would arrest her mother, father, and boyfriend if she didn’t “marry” her interrogator-torturer and convert to Islam. She submitted.
  
  This was “legalized rape,” as she says. “I didn’t have a choice.” Interesting about her “husband”: He had been a prisoner himself, under the shah, and tortured -- tortured for three years. Now he was the torturer. Three months after the “marriage,” he was killed -- “assassinated,” Nemat says. Curiously enough, it was his family that pleaded for her release. They secured it.
  
  She went home to her parents. At the dinner table, they talked about the weather. No one asked her what had happened inside the prison. “It would have been nice if someone had said, ‘When you’re ready to talk, we’re ready to listen.’” But no one said anything. The experience was just swept under the rug.
  
  She married her boyfriend, who was the organist at church; she herself was in the choir. “The marriage was an act of defiance. I converted back to Catholicism when I married André. This put another death sentence on my head, because if you convert to Islam, and then convert out of Islam, you are automatically condemned to death.”
  
  Years passed. Nemat was living in Canada. And it was in 2002 that “I lost the ability to sleep. The past caught up with me. I started having nightmares, flashbacks, and I had to do something about it: either go jump off a bridge or tell my story.” She took the latter course.
  
  She stresses that what happened to her in Evin is going on every single day, with other girls. The only thing that has an effect, she says, is international pressure.

That's all for now.

30, Flirty, and Fun

Came back last night from California. I was there from Wednesday until Sunday, but it may as well have felt like 5 minutes. Everything about it was perfect - Utah decided to have snowy, frigid weather while I was away, and California welcomed me with temperatures in the 70s and hardly a cloud in the sky the whole time I was there.

I managed to:

• Catch the Angels' game Wednesday night - the walk-off win on a bunt single by Howie Kendrick.
  
• Visit with my dad on his birthday.
  
• See my mom after she was stuck in Brazil for 45 days.
• Play soccer Wednesday night on 3 hours of sleep and after a baseball game and 9-hour drive before that. I was better than I would have expected, especially since I haven't played at all since January. Devastating, I know. That's the longest stint without soccer in my entire life, except for the mission.
  
• Hot tub twice.
• Magic Mountain without any lines the whole time. We just about walked onto every ride, and we got so spoiled that when they said waits extended to 15 minutes, we would just walk away instead. Nothing beats X2, but you know what else? Don't ride rollercoasters on an empty stomach. The whole time I kept thinking I was just getting old and not cut out for them anymore, but then I ate something and felt fine after that.
  
• Caught the Hurley warehouse sale and bought lots of new stuff.
• Got me some new business Rainbows.
• Spent time walking on the beach, watching rugby on the grass field in between A and B streets, walked the peninsula, and ate a corn dog at Jane's Corn Dogs, which, incidentally, are awesome. As good as any corn dog I've had.
• Went for a run in Peter's canyon.
• Hung out for Dave's birthday party, which turned out to be great, thanks to the efforts of his lovely little wife.

And now I'm back here, to my semi-real life. Coming back from vacation is really not so bad when all you really have to wake up for is golf class at 9:00 am. Even then, I debated with myself this morning if I should go or not. I did, of course, after reminding myself that I really wanted to take the class and work on my game. Tomorrow night our stake softball league is starting up, and I'm thinking that I should probably join, especially since I don't have my bowling night anymore this summer.

You know what's really great? Realizing that I have so many wonderful friends and a great family. Sure, my dad is kind of weird to me a lot of times, but he's a really decent person and does the best he knows how. My mom is the sweetest person in the world. And I have amazing, amazing friends. I also realized that I have lots of really awesome couple-friends, which can be kind of hard to find because adding another person makes it that much trickier. I wanted to drop by Laura's on the way back from Magic Mountain because I knew it was a bad time to drive home (4pm on a Friday through LA), but for some reason decided against it. Anyway, I just love that I'm from such a cool place and home is punctuated by the fact that I have so many people that make it so great. I really can't say enough about how great I have it with all the people in my life.

So here goes...trying to work on my thesis, get into a regular running schedule, fulfill my calling, and everything that's involved with life back here in Provo.

I'd post pictures, but as has been the case over the last year, I don't have a camera, so I have nothing to show for it. But trust me, it all happened, and it was all great.

Life Is Good

You know what? I really like my life as a student. A friend of mine made a comment last week about how she's so glad to be moved on from student life, but I really like mine. True, I don't have money so I can't buy much stuff or go cool places, but I have plenty of time, and time is something that I always feel so short on.

Through last Wednesday, last week really stunk. But then you know what happened? I finished, and all of a sudden I didn't have anything I had to do. I woke up when I felt like it on Thursday. I went to lunch with a friend for like two hours. I took a big ol' nap because I had plenty of time, and then I just hung out for the rest of the night. Do you remember on Ferris Bueller when his parents leave, and he goes to open the blinds to light up his darkened room and then there's just bright blue skies greeting him from the outside? I totally had that moment last Thursday when I went to my living room and opened up all of our windows and light just burst forth, and I realized that I had not care in the world at that moment. I loved it.

Then Friday I went camping with seven other friends in Zion National Park. I was worried that it might be kind of chilly down there, but the weather couldn't have been more inviting. It was gorgeous. We hiked into Hidden Canyon and it was so much fun scrambling up rocks, over the trail where the canyon obscures the light that might remove the snow, and just hiking and breathing in the beauty of it all. It's a funny thing when you're hiking, not to just put your head down and be so focused on getting to the next destination. I tried to stop every once and a while and bask in the sight around me. I guess that can serve as a metaphor for life in general, right? It's easy to be so focused on getting from one step to the next, worrying about not getting tripped up by some rock protruding in the path, but then you fail to realize just how amazing and great it is to just be in the present unless you can just pick your head up and look around you.

Then church yesterday was really great, teaching the elders, getting to know different people. Every lesson and talk felt perfectly suited to what I needed to hear. I love the leaders in my ward and the members that are all around. There are really so many great people.

Today I got up and cleaned my filthy apartment, and looked outside and decided I would run in the warmest part of the day just to feel the sun beat on my skin, and then I saw a friend of mine across the way on his balcony tending to his flowers. Funny, right? I yelled to him that we should go bowling or catch a movie when I got back. And I love Provo this time of year. I can't believe how many blooming trees there are, just everywhere. If you drive down 9th east to the temple there are a whole line of trees with these beautiful white blossoms. There are some similar trees on this street right over by my house and they have these gorgeous pink and white blossoms, and they just popped open in the last day or two. When I finished my run, my friend was still up there. Then we caught an afternoon matinee at the dollar theater. Honestly, is there a greater symbol of a leisurely lifestyle than watching a movie in the middle of the day and coming out to several more hours of light? (Actually, there is...going to the beach with the windows down, music blasting, and doing whatever you do at the beach, falling asleep to the ocean waves for a few minutes, and then coming home and hanging out in your bathing suit the rest of the day.)

Tomorrow I am leaving to go home. I'm going to buy some golf clubs, go longboarding, run in Peter's Canyon a couple of times, maybe run on the beach, catch an Angel's game, go to Magic Mountain, celebrate my best friend's birthday, and play with his kid and see my family. Then you know what I come back to? Golf class during the spring, trying to get into marathon shape, working on my thesis, and maybe finding another hobby to take up. Wood working? Who knows. Point is, I really dig on my lifestyle. Sure, school can really weigh me down sometimes, but I have so many long breaks and in betweens that allow me to do just about whatever I please. And I am so grateful for that.

This is an Honest, Goodbye, School! (for now)

Hey, guys...guess what? I made it. It required me only sleeping about 5 hours in a 50+ hour period, and writing 28 pages of stuff between Tuesday and Wednesday, but I made it. And why do I always end up planning down to the very last minute to finish everything? You know what made it really hard? I planned down to the minute for how it would work out with a final yesterday morning at 7:00AM, a paper also due at the start of the final, and then (I thought) two more finals due at 5:00Pm the same day. Just to be sure that all those times were right, I checked the deadlines again the day before, only to find out that what I thought would be due at 5:00PM was due at 12:00PM. For a lot of people that's not a big deal, but for me, yesterday, yes, that would be a huge deal. I finished my paper at about 6am, did my last bit of studying until 7am, took my final, came straight home, finished up another final by 11:10AM, wrote my last paper running completely on fumes, and was finished by 12:15PM.

A couple of people were really excited for me, asking me right around 11:45AM if I was done yet, thinking that for most people that would be cutting close enough as it was, but at that point I still had another 3 pages to write. And I know you're thinking, wow, he must really turn out crap if it's all that last minute, and he must not be doing that well. Here's the crazy part...

My grades have always been really good. About 3 weeks ago, I did a similar thing for my MBA course. I had a whole book to read, and a 7-page paper to write, that would be graded competitively against 40 or so other MBA students, and I had about 24 hours to do it. I thought my product was okay, and then I got my grade back for the paper: 95/100. Professor thought it was great. And thus, continues my reinforcement history of procrastination and staving off responsibility until the very last possible second.

When I was telling another friend, a fellow procrastinator, about everything that I had to do still, she just laughed and told me to go ahead and wait until the last possible minute anyway. It's more time efficient, she said, to just put it off until then. It's just kinda weird that she's right. Yeah, there is a lot of worry up until the deadline is done and the product has been submitted, but I manage to do a lot of other fun things in the meantime (albeit, with some level of worry and anxiousness in the back of my mind about what I'm putting off), and in what takes hours or days or whatever for other people, I churn out ridiculously fast.

If I were only doing coursework, then this method could work forever, but my thesis, and eventually my dissertation, just simply won't work doing it this way. That procrastinating is just a bad habit is not why I need to change; I have to change if I want to make it through my program and get through these huge projects.

Anyway, so that brings me to now: I am free. At least for the next week and a half or so. Most of next week will be spent basking in the warm California glory of my home, and part of this weekend will be spent in Zion. But, school's out for summer. This summer all I have is my thesis to really focus on, my golf game, my running, and probably my tan. I'm really excited about all of it, as you can imagine.

You know when my favorite moment is with finishing? It's always the morning after when I wake up without the benefit of an alarm (which, admittedly is how most of my days are anyway, but that's beside the point), and I look at my now-blank whiteboard, I jump online and read my news sources, and then I start blasting my music because I am all done and I have not a care in the world.

Sunday Thoughts

Went to the Men's Volleyball game on Saturday night. How's this for bad luck? The men were on an 11 match win streak. They had only lost 2 other home games this entire season. They had swept the match the night before. And with all of that, somehow Amy and I managed to go to the only three matches that they had lost at home all season. In fact, the last time they had lost was when we had gone to see them play when they lost to Pepperdine. It was the same pattern every time too: hosting a pair of weekend matches against highly ranked opponents, win on Friday, lose on Saturday night when Chris and Amy can make it out to see them. They lost in the fifth set Saturday night. Lame.

So it started with the loss Saturday night. I just started to become really irritable. I couldn't put my finger on it. For those of you who have heard my stories the last couple weeks, then you know that one of the things that had been really bothering me is something that happened with my roommate almost two weeks ago. I thought maybe it was that. Then I thought maybe it was something else having to do with the same person, but that wasn't the case either. I was just in a sour mood and I couldn't put my finger on the reason as to why.

Then I couldn't really sleep at all Saturday night. I had a hard time falling asleep that evening, and then had really disturbing dreams the whole night, and then I woke up to texts from the bishop asking about sacrament and if it had been taken care of and blah blah blah. That's when I realized that I had been so agitated because of the anticipation of this new calling.

I really didn't think that I was anxious about it, but Sunday marked the day when I would be officially responsible for a bunch of new stuff, and I was feeling nervous about it.

But then I got set apart. I got my councilors, and they're really great, really stand-up guys. And then we had ward council. And then we had our first EQ presidency meeting together. And all of a sudden all the stress I had been feeling started to dissipate.

It's such an amazing thing to feel the ways in which Heavenly Father buoys us. Even with just the few steps that I had taken yesterday, with the blessing in the setting apart, with having various meetings, and thinking about and praying about different things yesterday, it was incredible to me how different I was feeling from one evening to the next. I almost can't believe the ways I've been able to see even just partial fulfillment of blessings from yesterday and in my patriarchal blessing, but I'm left with no other option than having to admit that His presence and His loving guidance is real. It seems like I'm always needing so much coddling throughout my life, and it always comes when I need it the most.

I'm excited for this new opportunity. It really is so fun to form new relationships and to be available to people. I'm so lucky to be in a great ward, to have such great leaders, and to have so much loving support from the people that are around me. I have the sweetest people in my life. It's such a tremendous blessing to have my eyes opened to all of that.

Sorrow No More

Yesterday was a lot of fun. Thanks everyone for the texts, comments, phone calls, and everything else. We ended up doing sushi last night, and even though most of the people who went had no interest whatsoever in sushi, they still all came out. Of the ten people who actually came to dinner, only three of us really like the stuff.

It had been months since I had been so I had completely forgotten just how good it is. There is a whole world of taste and flavor that becomes available to you when you get passed the mental barriers against the food, which I think is totally understandable. It's only been in the last five or so years that I've really embraced it.

I don't have anything profound to say, and there's nothing really exciting going on this weekend, but I just wanted to wish you all well. If I were in Southern California I would be going to see Bad Religion play their final concerts ever. You can catch them tonight and tomorrow at the House of Blues in Hollywood. Guess what? Strung out is opening for them tomorrow night. I can't talk about it anymore, I might start getting all teary eyed.

You guys are wonderful. Really. Thanks for your support, friendship, and love. I hope you have a wonderful weekend. Be blessed, y'all!

Happy 30th, Me!

Well, here it is. I officially completed the last year of my 20s just over an hour ago, and I'm none the worse for the wear. I said this last week, but I'm really not fazed about turning 30. Turning 29 last year was a little harder for me, I think, because it was getting comfortable with the idea of 30 looming the following year, but now that I've had a whole year to brace for it, it really doesn't bother me like I would have thought it might.

And because my peers are mostly around this age of 30, some of them have dedicated blog posts to it. Some say things like "I'm so glad that I got married later because I wouldn't have appreciated it when I was younger," or "I'm glad to be older and still single because" blah blah blah. This only applies to me, and not to those other people, but I can't say that I'm a better person because I'm still unmarried or that it could have never been just as good some other way, maybe even better. I can't say that I wouldn't have appreciated being a father at a younger age. The fact is, I just don't know. Maybe I wouldn't have appreciated it at first, but maybe I would have grown into it. Maybe I wouldn't have learned the same lessons I would have learned going down this path that I've been on, but maybe I would have learned other just as valuable things that I can't even fathom because I honestly have no idea how I would have reacted to married life or being a parent or whatever.

The only thing I do know is that with the ups and downs that I've had over the years, the only thing that really matters is that I've learned to be content with the things allotted unto me (right now, at least - check back in a few months to see if that's still the case).

This is what I have going for me:

• I love BYU. I love my program and what I'm doing. I have amazing professors and opportunities to learn and develop skills, and to further my career prospects. I interact with so many people for whom I have so much respect.
• I live in an amazing ward. We have an amazing bishopric and stake presidency. There are so many awesome people that live within just a couple of blocks of me, and I think I want to be best friends with all of them. Next week I get to go camping in Zion with 12 of them. Although I wouldn't have chosen my new calling for myself, I feel like I already have a lot of support, and I'm excited about the new relationships and experiences that I'll be having.
  
• I am in great physical shape. I haven't actually gotten sick sick in a couple of years. I had a bad cough for a month or so, some sniffles here and there, but nothing that has put me out of commission for a long time. I haven't even gotten the flu or thrown up in ages. I'm only 6 months removed from having run a marathon, and I'm planning on running another one this summer, and maybe two this year. I am so grateful for health that allows me to play sports and do physical things whenever I want and I never really get tired or even sore. That's such a source of joy for me - just to be able to play and be active. I live for it and am so grateful for it.
• I have a wonderful family. The coolest thing about my family is that I always know I have their unfailing support. Although they haven't always agreed with my method, they have always ultimately trusted my judgment. All my life it's been that way. It's so nice to not feel challenged, threatened, or doubted by people who are so close to my heart. It makes me feel like I can do anything. And while I've never been the person who knows everyone and has a million friends, one thing I've always been very, very good at is developing deep and meaningful relationships with the people around me. I've learned to bloom where I've been planted and, as a result, I have so many people that I love and can turn to whenever I need a listening ear or advice about anything at all. I have a best friend that I have 17 years of history with. Do you have any idea how many dates Dave has heard about? How many hundreds, and maybe thousands, of hours we've played soccer together? How many times he's heard about my heartbreak? how many times he's heard me excited about some girl? How many of you were baptized by your best friend and can still remember that day? or the day you went through the temple and received your endowment together? We're as close as two people can be. I'm just sorry that none of the people in my life here in Utah even know who he is. And his family is my family. I love them all to death. I just love love love the people in my life. I'm so glad to know you all.
• I'm dating an amazing girl. She's a magnet for fun. At her insistence we went golfing last weekend. She wants me to give her some tennis tips this weekend. And the Zion camp-out was her idea. And as enjoyable and exciting as all that stuff is, she makes me feel so loved and cared for, and makes me be the person I want to be, or at least I'm working towards it. She's just great. I couldn't be happier with her or how things are going with her.
  
• Above all, I have the gospel. I have a temple within minutes of my house and I'm eligible to participate in the ordinances therein. I hold the priesthood and have so many opportunities to serve. Although I'm not one of those people who just loves to serve, I do love the relationships and the bonds that come as a result of it. And even though I have so far to go in my own personal development, and I make mistakes left and right, I love that I have the opportunity to repent and atone for my errors, that there is a Savior who makes that possible. I don't have to be resigned to a fate wherein I cannot escape the follies of my past. I am not beholden to the person that I was yesterday because tonight I will lay down and die to this day, and then rise again tomorrow trying to move just one more step down the straight and narrow towards an eternal home. That's something that engenders hope within me, and for which I am so grateful.

So there you go. Turning 30 really isn't so bad when I have all of that going for me. Plus, I have so much more to look forward to over the next few weeks and months ahead. Thanks for dropping by.

The Pale Blue Dot

8 And it came to pass that Moses looked, and beheld the world upon which he was created; and Moses beheld the world and the ends thereof, and all the children of men which are, and which were created; of the same he greatly marveled and wondered.

9 And the presence of God withdrew from Moses, that his glory was not upon Moses; and Moses was left unto himself. And as he was left unto himself, he fell unto the earth.

10 And it came to pass that it was for the space of many hours before Moses did again receive his natural strength like unto man; and he said unto himself: Now, for this cause I know that man is nothing, which thing I never had supposed.

The speech is one given by physicist Carl Sagan. It's really nice, and totally reminded me of the above scripture found in the Book of Moses from The Pearl of Great Price.The video is really cool. Lots of fun movie clips interspersed throughout.

And then this trailer might make you want to cry, just a little bit. The movie has gotten great reviews, and I'm interested.



I did my taxes this morning on the really cheap. One of the financial blogs I follow gave a list of free federal filing services, and one of them listed was H&R Block. I filed my fed taxes for free, state ones for $9.95. I wasn't expecting to get anything back because there are no withholdings at BYU, but as it turns out, I qualified for $755 in refunds. Woo! Plus I cashed out my 401k from my old company, so I have a couple hundred more dollars coming to me. So the question is...what do I do with this windfall of money? I think I can spend half of it, and then be smart with the other half.

The fun half is going to fund my newfound golf habit, but what else? Hiking/camping stuff for the summer? Or put it towards the scooter fund? Or how about some more new clothes? I want too much, but at least these ducats that I've stumbled upon will help feed that appetite for at least a little bit. Taking the money goes against my conservative principles, but I think taking it also helps to bring to bear the consequences of our government's loose monetary policies, so in the end, it's actually helping, isn't it?

One Is the Loneliest Number

We had stake conference this past weekend, and it was really great. Our ward boundaries were redrawn, and a new ward was formed, taking away about a third of our members. As far as singles wards go, our ward is still pretty big, so I'm sure it will still be a great. Around these parts, it's actually got quite a reputation as being the ward that everyone wants to be in if they're over 25 and still single.

I've come to really appreciate our stake president, President Baker. In the evening session yesterday he talked about the pervasiveness of loneliness among the members here in Utah Valley. He regularly conferences with other local stake presidents, and they all express the same concern - loneliness is the number one problem among the members. What's really surprising is that it's not just the concern for single members, but the married ones as well. Everyone feels it, married or not.

I have a few friends that seem to have it in mind that these feelings of loneliness go away with marriage, but the truth of it is sometimes those feelings can even come up when you're in a crowd. JD gets it:


President Baker suggested that the solution to the problem is the same as what President Hinckley said all new converts need in the church:

1. Everyone needs a friend - everyone needs to feel wanted.
2. Everyone needs a calling - everyone needs to feel needed.
3. And everyone needs to be nourished by the good word of God.

I've felt pangs of loneliness in my life before. Recently, I think those feelings were strongest last (school) year when I first moved back up here and I had to rebuild all my social connections and find a place for myself. And I remember there were definitely times when I thought everything would just go away if I were in a relationship, but the truth is, loneliness encompasses more than just that area of life, like President Baker suggested.

Not only do I feel like I have people that care about me and want me around up here, but I feel like there are people who depend upon me. I feel like I am doing what I can to be nourished by the word of God, however much my own efforts still need to be improved in that area. But doing those things really does make a big difference in helping to combat those feelings of loneliness.

Since I've been up here I have had the wonderful pleasure of serving as a gospel doctrine teacher in the ward. It's probably my favorite calling that I've ever had. I just love it, but in the last few months I've also felt like I've gotten really comfortable in this area and could use some stretching.

Well, with the reorganizing I'm getting a new one. Any guesses?

Busy, but loving it

I was having lunch today with my favorite Utah lunch buddy, Mike Reid, and we talked briefly about how busy we both have been. (Dave, you are always my number one lunch buddy. You know that. So does everyone else.) This was inspired by Dave giving Mike a hard time for not hanging out more with me, but I've been just as busy as he has been so don't lay blame at his feet anymore: I've been just as busy and our lives don't intersect as much as I'd like them to, either.

Anyway, I was looking over my calendar for the last couple months, and then for what's coming up over the next month and I was amazed at how much crap I've been able to do. This is what's happened in the last six or so weeks:

• Couple of awesome days snowboarding, which admittedly, didn't happen nearly enough this year. How is it that I forget how much I love it? Costs be damned, it's totally worth it.
  
• Vegas trip
• Brian Regan
• Concert in Park City (that didn't really pan out, but it was still fun being up there).
• Muse
  
• Various little in betweens including movies, seeing a jazz band, watching a production of As You Like It, volleyball games and more.

In the next six weeks this is what's in store:

• My birthday - T-minus 6 days. Turning the big three-oh, which, surprisingly enough, I'm pretty indifferent to. More on that next week.
• Camping trip to Zion immediately after the semester.
  
• Trip back home the following weekend.
  
• Maybe a bachelor party for Mike?

The camping trip and going home are the two things that I'm really looking forward to. The main feature of Zion will be doing a slot canyon, which sounds like a lot of fun, but the type of thing that I have no experience with. Now channeling adventure mode...

Going home has a schedule that's already filling up. This is what I'm hoping it will look like:

• Arrive Tuesday entirely for the purpose of...
  
• Going to the Angels' game on Wednesday. It has a 4pm start, which I'm really excited about, so it'll be a nice early evening game against the Indians.
  
• Thursday will probably be a beach day, with a special guest arriving that evening...
• Friday will hopefully be Magic Mountain.
  
• Saturday will hopefully be an awesome birthday celebration for Dave or his heir to the throne, Mason.

And then back home the following day. See? It's all really busy these days, but with so many good things.

So, as you can see, things are going great. As long as it doesn't snow like a foot on my birthday like it did last year, I think I'll love it, whatever ends up happening. Right now the forecast says 66 degrees and sunny, so here's to hoping that holds true in 6 days. I couldn't be more happy with how things are going, largely speaking of school and personal life, and I just love the people that are in my life. I had some thoughtful blog posts in mind, but I don't have enough time to develop those, so you only get the bubbly update on me.

I'm so excited for the summer. Golfing everyday during spring term. Long boarding in the canyon. Training for some yet to be determined marathon. Another bowling league. Making actual progress on my thesis (ahem!). Summer nights. Getting lots of sun. Camping trips.

Rise up this mornin',
Smiled with the risin' sun,
Three little birds
Pitch by my doorstep
Singin' sweet songs
Of melodies pure and true,
Sayin', ("This is my message to you-ou-ou:")

Have a great weekend, dear ones.

Today's Favorites (Mine)

Sometimes the best social commentary comes from the unlikeliest sources:


There are too many things that I love about this picture. Behold, ye old Saddest Cookbook Ever:


Along with the rest of pop culture, I can't get enough of this song. As was pointed out to me, the best line by far is when he says, "You the whole package plus you pay yo' taxes."

And how about a quote that makes me sound super smart because I read existential philosophy? (Don't be fooled though. It was part of some reading for a class of mine, and I don't think I quite got what most of the reading was about, but I did like this snapshot of existentialism.) This comes from Kierkegaard:

Imagination is the possibility of all reflection, and the intensity of this medium is the possibility of the intensity of the self.

That's all for now, friends. Have a good one.

If You Love Me At All, Don't Call

What's the moral of the story behind the movie 500 Days of Summer? I think one possibility goes something like this - people have no problems with committing when it's the right relationship. Summer was fickle and non-committal because she just wasn't all the way there with him. She wasn't really fair to him, yes, but he should also have been able to recognize her cues. When it comes to boys and girls and relationships, "friendships," there is a responsibility on the part of both parties to protect themselves and also a little bit of protecting the other party from him- or herself. Just a few other things...

I have a friend that laments her "commitment problems," but really all I see from her is that her problems have a lot more to do with the guys that she's trying to get herself to fall for. I don't know all of her dating history, but the last few that I have been around for are guys that I never would have thought would be good for her anyway. None of them seem like a fit (at least from my standpoint), but she chides her inability to like like them as stemming from her inability to commit. Her inability to commit to any of these guys has less to do with these guys and more to do with her finding the right type of relationship for her. Methinks, at least.

Here's something that I think is worth remembering - just because someone is willing to pick up your bill and be nice to you doesn't mean that it's a match made in heaven. I know that's contrary to what some church leaders and maybe even some parents would postulate, but I think holding out for someone that is kind and you love and admire is worth holding out for and is worth it, right? Why does it seem like that can be too much to ask for sometimes? It seems like the older we all get as young single adults, the more people want to retract that sentiment.

For all of you married people out there, would you ever admit that you weren't picky about your decision either? I can think of a lot of cases where people wish that they were more picky than they ended up being. And just because I turn 30 in less than two weeks doesn't mean that these are things that I think are worth eschewing either. (I know also that love is something that you work at and builds over time, so don't bother me with those kind of comments, this is just a simplification of some of what I've been seeing and hearing around me lately.)

I think what really makes for a great relationship is when both people in the relationship feel like they kind of lucked out to get the other one. There is definitely a need for getting just a little more than you bargained for, in the positive sense, obviously. But after everything is said and done, when both parties feel like they are the lucky ones, that's a hugely important thing, isn't it?

Transitioning to another dating vein, Orson Scott Card wrote this article a few months and I've been meaning to post it for the longest time. In his piece, he takes the stance that guys do this to girls all the time, but I know several current cases of this going in the other direction. These days it seems like girls are just as prone as guys to make the same mistakes. The piece is about the book He's Just Not That Into You. These are my favorite parts from the article:

Here's a partial list of these crimes of the heart:

Not calling when you said you would.

Making excuses for why you haven't been attentive, instead of telling the truth, that you're not really interested in her.

Exploiting her for companionship, while tying her up so that she doesn't feel free to pursue a man who might actually want to marry her.

Breaking up with her and yet still hanging around, giving her hope that you will get back together when in fact you are merely lonely and using her till you find somebody better.

...Here's the message of the book (He's Just Not That Into You), and it's a good one:

Tell the truth. Do it kindly, but do it. "I don't see this turning into any kind of long-term relationship, and I'm not going to waste your time or mine, when we ought to be finding someone else."

You might preface it with something decent and polite: "You're attractive and admirable. You're exactly the kind of woman I want to want to marry. But I'm not actually interested in marrying you, for reasons I don't understand and won't try to explain."

After you realize it yourself, the sooner you say it the better. And then get out of her life. Don't hang out with her. Even if you think she's "over you," she's not. There you are, a constant reminder that you didn't want her.

Don't send her little presents. Don't call her up and chat. Don't ask her for favors. Because that's what a guy who's courting a woman would do, and you're not that guy. Stay broken up. Go away.

O ye single men of Zion, if you read this book, you will have a good set of guidelines for interpreting your own feelings and behavior.

If you find that you don't think of her at all for days on end, you're just not that into her.

If you only think of her when you need something, instead of thinking of how to make her happy all the time, you are so not in love.

What it comes down to is this: Be honest and fair. Don't take, when you don't intend to give more than you receive. Don't use up a woman's youth when you don't plan to be there for her old age.

I know one poor shmuck going through this right now with a girl and for all of his friends coaxing and cajoling, he won't remove himself from her. Is it her fault or his? A little of both, probably. Just being friends when serious feelings were or are still involved just doesn't work. It takes some time to detach, and even when that has happened sometimes it still doesn't work. Emotions are a tricky thing.

Jimmy knows what I'm talking about:

Light Up the Halo!

Here it is...the baseball season is finally upon us. Finally. Actually, did baseball ever really stop? The World Series extends into November now, then the free agent period starts in December, and then Spring Training picks up in February, and now we're at opening day. So...yeah...

Anyway, they opened up the season last night and looked awesome. Jered took the ball as our #1 and pitched a solid six innings, giving up three. We had three home runs supplied by 3M - Matsui, Morales, and Mathis. Fernando Rodney made his debut as our new setup man, and Scot Shields still is on the road to recovery.

This is very early, based on only one game, but...I like our chances. I know, Kent, ever the pessimist with crazy high expectations, you are still sore about losing Figgy. But consider these points:

• Our stable of starters, 1-5, are all very solid. Everyone around the league is talking about our pitching depth. We don't have a clear #1, but we have about five #2s, and that will keep us competitive throughout the season.
• We lost Darren Oliver, which I think will be a big loss, but we got Fernando Rodney. He gave up a lot of runs last year, but he's a capable setup man, and could be someone we could turn to if Fuentes can't get it together. We still have Kevin Jepsen, who I think may turn into our closer. Shields is on his way back, and I kind of love him. And if Arredondo can recover his 2008 form, then our bullpen will be pretty amazing this year. Plus we have Jason Bulger...I just like that guy. I think our bullpen is looking pretty deep actually, and that's before considering Shields fully recovered from last year, or assuming that Arredondo will return to form.
  
• Morales had an awesome year last year, but I kind of think sky is the limit with this guy. His 2009 stat line of .302, 34 HR, and 108 RBIs is not far off the 2006 MVP year Vlad had with .329, 33 HR, 116 RBIs. I think he had an awesome year, but I don't think we've seen his career year yet.
• I think Aybar is going to be better than Figgins. I just said it. Aybar plays better defense, has already settled into his position, and already put up awesome numbers last year. It would be nice if we had both of them, but I think Aybar will fill in nicely as his replacement.
• I know it's only one game, but I think Matsui will more than fill the shoes that Guerrero left behind. I think he's got more shelf life than Vlad does.
• Jeff Mathis looks like he's continuing on his hot streak from the ALCS. Admittedly, I've always loved him more than Nap, even though Nap gives us more power (probably). But his defense is awesome, and I think he's finally getting comfortable at the MLB level. Either way, I'm feeling good about that position.
  
• I know you don't love him like I do, but I think Howie is going to be great for us. Did you know he's actually a career .302 hitter at the MLB level? He started off weak last year, but from the time he came back from Triple A, he batted over .350. Pretty awesome. And he hit as well as anyone else in the postseason.
  
• Did you know Juan Rivera hit 25 HR last year? And in the other full season he played for us, he hit 23 HR and batted over .300. The guy is a decent player, especially for someone who is going to hit in the 6 or 7 slot for us.
• You can pretty much pencil in Hunter and Abreu being solid for us this next year.
• The only real question mark we have is Brandon Wood. And even if he doesn't work out, we have Izturis to fill in who is a very capable back up. I don't think we'll stand pat with just him there if Wood doesn't work out, but I like our chances with these guys.
  

So our opening day lineup looked like this:

• Erick Aybar - SS
  
• Bobby Abreu - RF
  
• Torii Hunter -CF
  
• Hideki Matsui -DH
  
• Kendry Morales -1B
  
• Juan Rivera - LF
  
• Howie Kendrick -2nd
  
• Brandon Wood - 3rd
• Jeff Mathis - C

You have guys 1-7 that can potentially hit over .300. Guys 2-8 can potentially hit 20+ HRs, and I think out of the catcher position we'll also get more than 20 HR. We have Weaver, Saunders, Santana, Piniero, and Kazmir as our starting pitchers. Within the last 2 seasons, each of those guys has had at least one season with 15 Ws, and respectable ERAs. Our bullpen has competent setup men, with a couple of guys who can close.

And get this...I just read this article that started off this way:

Imagine the worst.

The Angels might trail the American League West in ERA and wind up tied for 11th in the league in opponents' batting average.

They might need 45 starts from pitchers outside their opening-day rotation.

Their closer might post a WHIP (walks, hits, per innings pitched) of 1.40, second-worst among the top 15 American Leaguers in saves.

The whole staff might post a 1.489 WHIP, fourth-worst in franchise history.

Their bullpen might trail the AL in ERA through much of the first half.

Their DH might play 100 games and drive in 50 runs.

They might have only one 200-inning pitcher.

They could lose eight of their first 12 and stand at 29-29 on June 11.

Howie Kendrick could get demoted to Triple-A for three weeks. Torii Hunter could miss 43 games. Ervin Santana could make only 23 starts and go 8-8.

If all of those plagues descend, the Angels will have difficulty winning 97 games.

But all of that happened in 2009, along with a midnight tragedy, and the Halos notched the third-most victories in their history and then swept Boston in the AL Division Series.

And then had this part:

You can only go with what you know.

Seattle can be a devastating short-series team because of its 1-2 combos: Ichiro Suzuki and Chone Figgins at the top of the lineup, Felix Hernandez and Cliff Lee on the mound. But in what amounts to maybe 54 short series, can Casey Kotchman and Milton Bradley drive in enough runs? They certainly wouldn't be hitting 3-4 for the Angels.

Texas is the coming power in the division. But if Rich Harden doesn't pitch 200 innings, which he has never done, can the Rangers really win?

Oakland, a Caltrans project perpetually under construction, has terrific pitching and is apparently buying into baseball's sudden preoccupation with defense (or, rather, the sudden illusion that it can be quantified). The A's will be very competitive. For how long is the question.

Really, the Angels have fewer riddles to solve than anyone.

So tell me, why can't we win our division this year? Seattle was the favorite in both 2005 and 2007, and who won both of those years? Last year we lost Mark Texeira, had no significant FA signings, lost one of our rising star pitchers in a tragic accident, yet we still were two wins away from the World Series. So enlighten me...why can't this team also win 95 games year and take the division?

...if he command me that I should say unto this water, be though earth, it should be earth...

Yeah, I just went scriptural...so why can't it happen for this team? I believe in Mike Scioscia, and I believe in our guys. Go Angels!

Muse at The E Center

Yup, I'm coming out of blog-hiding to blog about them.

Last night Amy and I caught Muse at the E Center in West Valley. First of all, I can't believe how crazy the weather was yesterday. At times it was blizzard conditions, and that only added to the chaos that was trying to get into and out of the parking lot last night, but pay no mind to that, because as can be expected, they were amazing.

Before you heard anything at the show, you saw these three giant square pillars that had a corner pointing out towards the center of the audience. The angles allowed everyone to get a unique, but I think consistent view of similar graphic images that were visible whenever the pillars were set up. One of the best parts of a Muse concert is just how much they invest in creating a musical as well as a visual experience. The graphics on display were amazing because they featured things like scrolling words and pictures of people or random things, but in the images displayed they also had live footage of the band as they played the songs. My favorite was the green laser show that they had going during Unnatural Selection (I think it was that song).

Words just can't express just how good they are live. I haven't seen a lot of big, big concerts like this one, but I really can't imagine many bands/singers being able to put together a better show than these guys do. They pay attention to every part of the show. Musically they're awesome, but they also create such an amazing experience overall. As good as they were the first time I saw them, it really seems like they took what they've learned over the years and keep on adding to their product, and what they turn out is pure gold. It's unreal.

They played nearly everything off of the The Resistance, but my favorite part of the show had to be when Matt Bellamy played The Star Spangled Banner, and then the whole band broke into Hysteria, and then they finished it off with the guitar riff from Back in Black. You can't get a sense for how awesome it was unless you saw/heard it for yourself.

There are a couple of tours that I'd like to catch this summer - U2, DMB - but I just wonder if anyone else can hold a candle to what these guys are able to do year after year. And, like 3 years ago when they last toured, I still want to have Matt Bellamy's babies. The guy is just so cool.

In No Particular Order

It's no secret that this blog has been neglected recently. I've been pretty busy these days. School is picking up over these last few weeks (sort of) of the semester so that's been a little hectic, but even outside of school, I've had a lot going on. I feel like I've been saying that for a little while now, thinking that things will slow down, but they just haven't. At all. Just last week I went to a friend's birthday dinner, saw a production of Shakespeare's As You Like It, went to a Grizzlies game, and then the Festival of Colors, on top of the regular things I have going on - FHE, bowling, etc. This week I have a concert in Park City on Thursday, snowboarding Friday, General Conference all weekend, and then going to see Muse(!!!) on Monday. In the midst of conference weekend I want to squeeze in an 8 mile run, the driving range (weather permitting), post-priesthood social at my bishop's, maybe a hip hop dance performance Saturday night, dinner up in Kayesville on Sunday, and rush back for another birthday party that same night.

Last night I was going over my calendar and my next five weekends are all pretty much planned out, with the exception of the Saturday the 17th. I'll be heading home that first weekend in May (1st and 2nd-ish), so Reids, if you're planning on Mason's or Dave's birthday party for a weekend, I suggest it be that Saturday the 1st. It looks like I won't even be able to run the Thanksgiving Point Half Marathon on the 24th because I'll probably be camping that weekend, not that I'm complaining.

I guess I feel like I owe it to you to give you some kind of explanation about my whereabouts. There have been plenty of blog posts a brewing, but I'm short on time these days. This is what's on the docket - posts about the stuff I've been doing, more health care, some thoughts on dating, social costs of pornography, baseball opening day, and whatever else I fancy.

Since I started this blog almost 3 (really, that long?) years ago, I have tried to avoid talking about my dating life in the present tense or at least I've worked towards that end. I think that practice will largely continue, but that aspect of my life, more than anything else, is probably the root of my time deficiency. And I really kind of love it.

This has been my theme song since I heard a cover of it a couple of weeks ago, but I still prefer the original. Plus, how awesome are the suits these guys are wearing?



That is all for now.

Sorry, Blogging

I suck at it this past month. And the weird thing is, I don't really even care. Here's to a cop-out Impromptus style post:

• March Madness - I created seven brackets, and not one of them has a single Final Four participant. A lot of people could have picked Duke, but they've been piss-poor the last several years and I didn't expect them to get past the Sweet 16. As for the the other guys, two 5 seeds and then West Virginia as a #2? You kidding me? I wonder if there is one person on the entire planet who picked that Final Four.
  
• UPDATE: I had a really mean comment here, and even if I think it's true, it's not something that I should be expressing aloud. I'm still working on not thinking it about this person, also. If you knew who I was talking about, you'd agree that she's just a huge goofball...as you were...
  
• Which reminds me, last week we were talking in one of my classes about how anonymity removes all need for normal social conventions, the internet being the prime example. The next day a friend of mine was telling me about a blog-post that she wanted to comment on because it really bothered her, and she was going to post as Anon, but decided against it. The end result was a much more positive outcome than would have been otherwise. So the lesson is this - standing by your opinions requires you to say things that are defensible, and that in turn requires you to be reasonable. It encourages decency, which unfortunately, is too often short-changed.
  
  The ironic part of this comment is that in the bullet point just previous, I was totally indecent to that girl because I know she'd never see this post, or even be able to identify herself as the culprit, but it's precisely because of that that I'm able to say something so harsh that I'd never say to her face. This just further illustrates my point - anonymity removes accountability, and no accountability allows you to say/do idiotic (or really mean) things. And again, if you knew who I was referring to then you'd agree with me.
  

I'll put up a real post soon enough. I have plenty of great insights the world (you) is dying to know about, and lots of great things to report on from my own life. But today I have to read Lord of the Flies and then write a paper connecting it to principles from my Org Theory class. Gag.

See y'all later!

Implications of the Health Care Reform

You know what's funny? For some people, I've become someone that they ask for my opinion about health care. Between last night and this morning several people asked me what I thought about the health care reform passage. I was checked out over the weekend as far as keeping up on everything that was happening in current events so I didn't have any firm ideas or thoughts about what all transpired. (That is, except for Kansas losing to UNI. Seriously? I had them in the Final Four in all seven of my brackets, and I think I had them winning in like five of them. I was so sure of them having a great tournament. The funny part was thinking about my old roommate and how that loss probably ruined his weekend, and the rest of the tournament. Although, knowing him, he's probably now rooting for Not-Kentucky. He really hates those guys. Consequently, I do too, and I share his disappointment about his team, but I digress.)

Fortunately for you guys, class got canceled this afternoon so I went on a crash course of reading various opinions about the legislation. This is what I've learned:

• So the current reform is mostly absurd. My friend, Dr. Nick, I think put the whole debate in really simple terms: Health care comes down to a triangle of three things - quality of care, quantity (coverage of the population), and cost. Changing any one of those variables has a dramatic effect on the other two. Democrats have been pushing the notion that you can improve coverage of health care without drastically driving up costs while also maintaining the same quality of care. Obama keeps touting the Congressional Budget Office's projections of few increases in costs of additional coverage, but the biggest flaw in those projections is that expenses for Medicare (or is it Medicaid?) will remain stable over the next decade, but that has not been the case in all of its years in existence. Plus, they purposefully pushed back some of the biggest expenses of the coverage several years so as to limit the budget projections. Sneaky...
• This sort of health care reform will most likely cause the economy to continue to languish and stay mostly stagnant over the next several years. Overhauling the health care system in this sense will force the government to cut expenditures in other areas, and where this mostly takes place is in national defense costs. For Democrats, this is not a big deal because they don't perceive that there is a real threat by other nations. In other countries where they've resorted to similar universal health care packages, this has been the case, and it will most likely be the same here. There will be other far-reaching effects that we can't even really fathom just because nobody really understands the breadth of such far-ranging legislation.
• As far as costs for health care, a lot of the tab will be picked up by the highest income earners. The biggest problem with that is that they are the ones who create the most jobs. Deincentivizing industry is a great cause behind economic stagnation. Eventually those costs will be passed on to the middle class, but the effects of that may not be felt for several years.
• Costs to consumers. The reform does not allow for pre-existing conditions to be a restriction for providing coverage, meaning everyone else has to absorb those costs, which is kind of crazy. What if car insurance were done this way? That means that overall rates would rise for everyone and good drivers would have to insure bad ones. That means your clean driving history will be expensed because someone else is reckless in their driving, speeding, getting into accidents, DUIs, etc. The idea is well-intended, but will have far-reaching consequences for everyone else that has bothered to take care of themselves. The comparison is not perfectly applicable, but is a good approximation.
• Costs for enrollment are pretty high and depend upon your income level. Not enrolling results in a penalty that will be assessed by the federal government. However, those penalties are not enough to deter people from not enrolling, so costs will escalate as people will pay the penalty, but enroll as soon as they do have any kind of real expenses. The problem here is that it will cause a glut of people to not contribute money to the health care system, and further exacerbate the problem of funding the reform. I didn't explain that in very clear terms, but I don't want to elaborate further.
• Opinion polls favors those opposed to the reform. Obama is less popular in his second year as President than even Jimmy Carter and GWB. Opposition to the bill has remained steady at more than 55%.
  
• The legislation cleared the House by a total of four or five votes. What is encouraging is that not a single Republican was in favor of the legislation, and about 34 Demcratic representatives also voted against it. No bill of this magnitude has ever passed with so little bipartisan support. This is significant because the tide that swept Democrats into office in 2006 and 2008 will most likely sweep them right back out of office in the 2010 and 2012 elections. Obama may have sacrificed his opportunity to win reelection, although running against the incumbent is always a daunting task.
  
• If there is any hope to repeal the damage done by the reform, it will require majorities in both the House and Senate, and probably a Republican president, meaning that nothing will really change until 2012 at the earliest. Change meaning repeal. This is a little scary, but not insurmountable. Additionally, it may also require super majorities in both Houses, and even then, legislation is usually worked well enough that there is built in insulation to protect against that sort of thing.
• Paul Ryan (R) of Wisconsin has begun to emerge as a leader within the Republican party. The guy is an articulate, red-blooded conservative, and will be an all-star within the party. All of the developments with this health care legislation has put him at the forefront of the party because of how doggedly he fought against it, but in a manner that was both completely intelligent and passionate. We will be hearing more from this guy in the future.
• What I think is really interesting and has received little attention, is how this kind of legislation not only changes how business is done, but also changes the minds and attitudes of people residing within the system. I have to develop my thoughts further on this, but this could potentially be one of the worst consequences of this kind of thing.

Here is some reading if you're interested: 20 ways Obamacare will take away freedoms; a bleak perspective from Victor Davis Hanson here; 5 reasons not to despair by Rich Lowry; Obamacare is not inevitable; Paul Ryan is not ready to give up.

But you know what? Things will work out. Maybe I have an annoyingly cheery temperament these days, but doomsday still has yet to arrive. There are a lot of factors favoring anyone opposed to the reform, and things will balance out somehow. We emerged from the Great Depression in spite of FDR's reforms, we'll somehow emerge from this. But do stay current. It does matter that we stay up to date on what's going on, and having an idea of what things we are in favor of, and opposed to.

Celebrating Terrorism

I know that most of you who come around here don't really care for the political stuff so my content of that ilk has largely moved away from that sort of thing, but sometimes there are things worth knowing about, right? I was reading Jay's Impromptu's column from yesterday and thought these tidbits were quite eye-opening:

We all know that the Palestinian territories -- or whatever expression you prefer -- are divided in two: The extremists, Hamas, control the Gaza Strip; the moderates, Fatah, control the West Bank. But what do you say to moderates’ naming a square in a town outside Ramallah after a terrorist? A mass-murdering terrorist?

They have just named the square for Dalal Mughrabi, a woman who led a team committing atrocities in 1978. Their atrocities are summed up in the name “Coastal Road Massacre.” I will quote from a column about this matter:

On a Saturday in March 1978, the squad of Palestinian terrorists led by Mughrabi entered Israel by boat from Lebanon and made their way to the main road between Haifa and Tel Aviv. . . . By day’s end, they had murdered 38 innocent men, women and children.

The first person Mughrabi and her gang of terrorists encountered was Gale Rubin, an American photojournalist taking photos of birds near the beach. They killed her and continued on their deadly path.

They then hijacked a bus full of happy families returning from a Saturday excursion. On their way to Tel Aviv, the terrorists shot at passing cars and killed more innocent people.

The terrorists tied all the men’s hands to the bus seats. When Israeli security forces stopped the bus, the terrorists ran out while throwing hand grenades into the bus, setting it on fire. The men inside were burned alive.

And so on. If you can bear to read this column in full, go here. And can you bear this? It was written by three Israelis whose children were killed by a terrorist in 2003.

Question: How can you make peace with people who celebrate those who kill you? How? I am very patient with the Israelis: They are in a difficult position, to put it as mildly as possible.

I think of the Sbarro attack in 2001. Do you remember that one? A terrorist blew up a Sbarro’s restaurant in Jerusalem, killing 15. Okay, you say: Every society has its extremists, its murderers. But what do you do with this? At An-Najah University in Nablus, they created an exhibition celebrating this massacre. It was a diorama of sorts -- a mock-up -- showing the restaurant. The walls were drenched in blood, and body parts were strewn all over, along with pizza slices. Palestinian students -- the best and brightest in that society -- filed by reverently. It was like a religious rite.

How do you make peace with such people? Maybe you do. But can you grant it is hard?

I thought this was especially interesting in light of what the Obama administration has been doing recently to try and coerce a peace accord in the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. Maybe you have or haven't heard about it, but VP Joe Biden and SoS Hilary Clinton have been trying to force concessions on the part of the Israelis and in the process it feels like they are villifying our one clear ally in the Middle East. It's shameful.

And why are they doing it? Because how can you try and speak reasonably to a society that celebrates mass murder? You're left with no other option but to go to the other side and ask them to abdicate because the ones who should be acquiescing simply won't. Instead they do things like name a parks after Timothy McVeigh and build dioramas of the Columbine school massacre. When you put it in those terms it sounds absolutely insane, doesn't it?

March Madness Cometh

I just spent the last 40 minutes filling out seven brackets. Stupid, right? I don't know why, but I hate filling these things out, even though I'll spend so much time reading and researching for other fantasy sports teams. But I always end up succumbing because I freakin' love racking up the points. One of these days I'm going to insist that we do a pool and winner gets all the cash. It's already fun as it is, but how much better would it be if you could win $50? Yeah, yeah, yeah, gambling...but seriously...who's interested?

It's so ridiculous that I would spend all this time on it. I think it also has to do with the fact that I have nine items currently on my list of things to do today, and I am strongly opposed to two of them in particular, and those two are the most important ones.

One of my old roommates was a huge Kansas fan, so I think I'm going to be sticking with the Jayhawk faithful. Plus, they're wicked good. Aldredge and Collins are pretty dang awesome. I'm surprised I picked BYU to win their opening match in nearly all of my brackets.

Don't disappoint me, Cougars.

Flowers In Her Hair, Flowers Everywhere

It's finally coming around. Daylight savings has lengthened the day. Temperatures are starting to creep up. I'm starting to go with my summer footware of choice - sandals - every day. There are some trees along Slate Canyon by my place that are about to blossom and are really fragrant, and I'm excited to start running by those again. My runs are more consistently outside now, rather than on the treadmill.

You know what's funny also? So many of my friends are starting to date and get involved in relationships. And come to think of it, it was about this time last year when things started to develop for me in that respect also. Wait a second...come to think of it...the most fruitful time of dating for me throughout all my life was always March. Weird....

Anyway, I'm excited. I'm excited for hikes, barbeques, camping, running, sun, for my complexion to finally darken, shorts, t-shirts, and barefeet. March madness is upon us. Opening day for Major League Baseball is less than a month away. These are happy times, people!

You know what else I started thinking about the other day? The 4th of July...summer Christmas. The t-shirt design portion of the year is upon us. Freedom Dawgs. That's right.


This video is hilarious. And that dude has one crazy gap tooth smile.

Human Nature

A few years ago some random guys helped out a girl I was dating when she was moving some stuff into her place from her car. (I wasn't there. Where was I? Not being a good boyfriend, I guess. I don't remember...) I asked her if she thought I would do that type of thing for a stranger. They didn't seem to have an ulterior motive because they didn't really try and get to know her, or get her number or anything - they were just being really nice. Then, as delicately and nicely as she could, she told me that she didn't think that I was the type to yell out from across the street and just help out a random person. That bothered me.

Since that time I have tried to be more conscious of those kinds of things, help out where I can, even with people I don't know. I've still got a lot of work to do in that regard, but I think I'm better than I was.

It's kind of interesting to me the idea of reactance - where you tell a person to do one thing, and then they do something different or even the complete opposite thing just because he/she is reacting against your declaration. This shows up in a lot of ways, and for me, it popped up in a big way earlier this week when I was bowling.

If there is anything I just can't tolerate, it's people being bad sports. I hate sore losers, and sore winners are just as bad, if not worse. We were about 40 pins ahead of the team we were playing against and for them to win their last guy had to hit four strikes in a row. The guy hit three (and it might have even started before then) when one of our guys started yelling out for him to get a gutterball. It just boiled my blood. I looked straight at him with daggers in my eyes and told him, "that's not cool, man, you don't do that." I think I'm too competitive to want to beat someone when he's not playing at his best. When I win, I don't want that other person to have any excuse as to why I beat him. I also kept thinking that if my kids ever ended up being poor sports that I would beat them mercilessly. That is just such low class behavior. I can't stand it.

(The guy hit the fourth strike. It was actually quite the spectacle. I was very impressed.)

It's funny how there are those little incidents that occur that just make me want to do anything but be the person that I'm reacting against. I don't want to be the person who just stands by and does nothing while watching someone in need. I don't want to be the person who is so low class that he would try and win by being a moron to the people whom I'm playing against. Sometimes those kinds of things really just make you sit up and take notice.

Never be uncaring about people. Never be a poor sport. Still working on both, but at least I have some direction about how I'd like to handle things.

This is just for your listening pleasure. I'd love to see John Mayer live. The guy is so talented.


Have a great weekend, dearhearts!

F(physical proximity)=emotional closeness

Basic attachment theory suggests three basic styles of attachment - secure, avoidant, and anxious-ambivalent. Secure is the healthiest and I think pretty apparent; avoidant is characterized by distance from others and a cynical view of others as untrustworthy and undependable; anxious-ambivalent is characterized by a strong desire to be close to others, combined with a fear that others will not respond to this desire.

When people find out that I'm a psychology graduate student they always have the same reaction - so are you analyzing me right now? What am I thinking? Other crap like that. What am I supposed to say to that? So are you saying that when you meet someone you aren't automatically formulating your own opinion of that person also? Doesn't everyone do that to some extent? That's my typical thought process when that comes up. But then there are other times when I'm learning about something in one of my classes and my focus will be directed on certain topics, and then yes, I am, in fact, analyzing you the through the lens of a particular theory.

I have been thinking about this idea for the last few weeks to varying degrees - closeness to people. I was talking to a friend of mine the other day who is in the Marriage and Family Therapy program, and she mentioned how one of the first things that she looks for as a therapist when working with couples is just how close they sit next to one another when they come in for counseling. Even before talking with this friend, I had been noticing it a lot with all of the people that I hang out with. I guess there are some cultural and personal preferences that people have that make them react differently, but it's a pretty safe assumption that when someone is feeling emotionally close with you, he/she will want to be physically close to you also.

I kind of think that this is a rule that generally applies across the board. It's easy to say that some people just aren't built that way, but of the people I can think of that don't exhibit that tendency, I would also characterize their relationships as being more distant than others. It's easy to see this in people that you're dating or in a relationship with, and I can also see how it is exhibited in friendships and other loose associations. With girls, it's super easy to tell when they are feeling close to me because it's pretty acceptable for them to sit right next to me, sometimes touching to a certain degree. Even with my closest guy friends, we'll sit right next to each other without any kind of awkwardness about it. With some people I know, it's a dead giveaway. And in a way, I'm really grateful for it because it's something that's so easy to read. When so and so sits right next to me, I know that things are just fine between us because this person is right here with me. I think my attachment style is pretty secure because I feel like I'm always craving closeness with the people around me, in one form or another.

I think the causal arrow probably only goes in the direction of emotional closeness leading to physical closeness. There are no broader implications or insights with this post. It's just an observation.

Loaded Answers

There are about a million things I want to say and write and do, but having so much in front of me sometimes paralyzes me and I end up doing nothing at all. It's a little bit annoying. A lot a bit, rather.

There are several feelings that I just love and don't think I'll ever be able to live without: the feeling of snowboarding and feeling the tension in my legs as I'm turning toe-side and pushing against the mountain and extending my legs from the crouched position to straight while my momentum carries me downward; running for an hour and still feeling strong and like I'm gaining momentum by the end of the run; feeling completely at home with another person and having full confidence in myself and in my position with that other person. Those are all feelings that I just have to have.

Yeah, so running yesterday...I'm surprised at how good I felt throughout. I ran 7.5 miles under an hour, and I feel like I could push that up to 9-10 next week. I want to run the Thanksgiving Point Half on April 24th, and I feel like distance-wise, I can work up to that mileage in two weeks, and I love feeling that kind of capacity when it comes to my fitness level.

Running definitely isn't for everyone. For a little while following the Chicago Marathon, I kind of took to trying to convince people that they all could do it too, but if someone just doesn't believe they have the capability to do so, they just won't, right? But if you really get me started on it, I can't think of one person that I know that is physically unable to cover that full distance - including no dying - provided that he or she puts in the work. Honestly.

I love the principle of repentance, if only because it means that I don't have to resign myself to my weaknesses. For the past 23 weeks I've been keeping track of every expense that I have, and I'm still far from perfect at it, but my spending and use of money are so much better now than they were back when I first started tracking everything. It's so empowering to feel like you have control over your life, and this is one small thing, but those are the kind that count, says me.

I want to sing praises to Progressive Auto Insurance. I used to have Triple A when I was in CA, and me being a moron, just kept that coverage when I moved out here to Utah. Last year my policy was an absurdly high $1800 for the full year. No accidents, but in a three month span I managed to rack up three tickets with one being covered by traffic school. Anyway, I shopped a few different insurance companies here this time around and even with a couple of additional violations (damn that California to Utah drive), I'm saving about $1000 off of any other insurance company. Unreal. So now I feel like I'm several hundred dollars richer. I could go into some behavioral economics stuff, but I'll spare you the details except for this one - I've framed this scenario as a gain so I'm flying high.

I don't even think I mentioned last week that I got out of another speeding ticket. There are all kinds of Ws all over place for me lately. Some people never get tickets, and I'm kind of a magnet for them. I attribute it to my minority status. I hate you white people.

...come to think of it, I do always get pulled over by white cops. I was just kidding before, but now I'm thinking maybe there's some validity behind that theory....

Although I get pulled over a lot, I think I get out of a lot of tickets for a guy. (Guys and girls aren't on the same playing field when it comes to getting out of traffic violations, not even close.) I think I get out of tickets about a third of the time that I get pulled over. I attribute it to how nice I am when the police officer comes up to my car. I pretty much resign myself to my fate of getting a ticket, and so when the officer comes up and sees me whimpering and completely vulnerable, it must thaw his icy cold heart and prompt him to not give me a ticket. It's surprisingly effective.

Back to Progressive...I have no idea what it's like on the back end should I ever get into an accident, and maybe that's where I'll wish that I ponied up a little more dough, but on this end where I'm saving about $700-1000, I'm pretty stoked.

Example of Progressive's awesomeness: Geico wanted to charge me $1700 for a full year, and knocked another $100 off for going from a $500 deductible to a $1000 one. I'm still at less than $800 with Progressive with a $500 deductible. And I've got emergency roadside and rental car coverage with that quote. Un. Be. Reeve. Able.

I would gladly be one of those real life customers they have on media campaigns who talk about how they saved over 60% by using their services....and they gave me this free bumper sticker with my purchase, too!

Not really, but you get my drift.

I got some variation on this very typical question yesterday: how are you? Answer: very good (well, rather. Sorry, third grade teacher, Mrs. Phelps). This guy really couldn't be any more happy than he is right now. I haven't been elaborating on the whys, and I won't bother to here either, but things are just great.

I just realized how much emphasis I've been using in this post, and I'm not even going to apologize for it. And with that, I hope you all have a great start to your week!

My Misadventures

I've gotta kill some time while I wait for one of my professors to fill out his evaluation of my performance last semester so I thought I may as well do something productive...like blog...

The last two weeks have been really interesting. I've been able to make some good headway on my thesis, I've had several midterms, and I had two presentations to give. Yesterday I had a 45 minute presentation for the other students and the faculty in my department and I winged the whole thing. Granted, I was only talking about how I got to where I'm at now in the graduate school and then some of the research I've done and what my current interests are, but I guess what's really weird to me is thinking that I've become a person that is so at ease now in front of large groups, even ones that should be intimidating like a bunch of people with PhDs or who are pursuing graduate degrees. I have to give thanks to the church for that one, however, because I've had so many experiences now in front of people giving talks or teaching classes that it's now something that doesn't even faze me. I wish you would have known me when I was a kid because I was deathly afraid of public speaking, but now it's something that I really kind of relish. It's weird to think about the ways you grow through the years. Thank heavens for that.

Saw The Princess and the Frog last night, which was a pretty cute movie, but what I really enjoyed was the real cartoon animation. There's something much more Disney and inviting about that, isn't there?

I had a nice little chat this morning with a friend from the place I worked at back home and I had forgotten how much I had missed her. Reminded me of that Lincoln quote, "The better part of one's life consists of his friendships." The people in my life comprise everything that makes me happy. I'm lucky to know the people I know, including all of you.

I love the 80s. You should know that by now, but it's really true. We have an 80s roller skating activity with my ward tonight and I couldn't be more excited. I even made a compilation of songs to get myself in the mood.

I'm surprised at how lazy I've gotten with this lately. It's not at all substantive, and for that, I apologize. I'll come back with a vengeance next week. Promise. Until then, have yourselves a merry little weekend, and enjoy this ditty by Sublime:

Confucius Say...

Do you ever look at your fortunes from fortune cookies and realize they actually kind of excited you? Or you feel like they're offering real words of wisdom?

I think the wisest fortune I ever got was the one that said, "The secret to getting ahead is getting started." Amen to that. Nobody has a bigger problem moving forward sometimes than I do, and I ended up taping that fortune to the wall right in front of my desk. I wonder if I still have it somewhere...

I've gotten a variation on this fortune a couple of times, and ain't no lie, but they always come to fruition immediately after: A treasured friend, not often seen, will soon visit you. I guess that's not of the earth-shattering variety, but I still thought it was kind of neat.

And these are two that I've gotten in the last month or so, and surprisingly enough, it seems like they're coming to pass - "Success will come to your plans," and "A new relationship is about to blossom. You will be blessed."

It's probably kind of dumb that I even hold onto those, but I think it's kinda fun. If I opened up a Chinese restaurant, I think I'd have anti-fortune cookies, just to mix it up a little bit. Maybe they wouldn't even be bad fortunes, but something that's either totally ominous like "Don't drive the next time it rains," or "You forgot to close your garage door this morning," or "Make sure to call your mom today."

Plus, how good is this song? The actual video doesn't allow for embedding, so you get a pretty decent cover of it by Howie Day.


Bonus: You've heard that they're doing a remake of Karate Kid, right? I hated the idea of it, until I saw the trailer. They changed enough, and I like Little Willy Smith enough to think it's kind of cool.

Logic Games

In my personality class we've been talking about two basic methods of reasoning - dialectical and demonstrative. Dialectical is basically finding an understanding through contrasts. You understand what black is because it's not white, that kind of thing. One example that he gives is when he was teaching at Baylor University in Texas, the preacher's kids were always the wildest kids around. They understood that being commanded not to do something in the first place also means that there is an option to do it as well. You understand what something is by also understanding what it is not. Does that make sense?

Anyway, I've been thinking about this a little more since I had a midterm on the stuff last week. So much of our understanding comes from the dialectic - trial and error. The converse of the dialectic is the demonstrative, which is consistent and true. Jesus Christ is the demonstrative example of the way to live our lives. It can be said that Paul or Alma the younger are the dialectical examples of how to live our lives - they are so good now, in part because they were once so bad. The ideal would be to avoid mistakes altogether and just live a consistently righteous lifestyle, but having the dialectic at least affords me the opportunity to live the kind of life I'd like to lead.

I know what it's like to be a good friend because I know what it was like when I was a bad one. I know how to treat people the right way because I've treated them wrong way before. It's kind of abstract, and maybe a little weird to think in these terms, but I think it helps me understand myself a little bit better, and also cut me some slack on being my own biggest critic. Sometimes that's a really hard thing to do.

I dunno. I was just kind of thinking about this lately as I've gotten closer to different people, and also I needed something to blog about since I've been neglecting you fools for so long. Last week was pretty busy for me, but I have a lineup of posts a coming. Don't you worry!