Not really, but dating sure does. A friend of a friend just went through a "violent" breakup, and my friend is compiling a breakup song compilation, which by the way, is probably one of the most fun and easiest playlists to make. Listening to those songs and the ones she's found has been really funny to me, mostly because I'm not currently going through that heartache, but I'm reminded of all of the old (sometimes pathetic) feelings I had. I think I've come a long way, Deborah, but I'm glad that what I had with you is in the rear view mirror.
Anyway, some of the sad stories I've heard lately:
- Girl likes guy, but guy is about a 7 hour drive away, and in the past he's been terrible at keeping up contact.
- Girl gets out of long relationship, finds herself in a new one, but circumstances make the new one difficult.
- Girl likes boy who carries the baggage of just recently exiting a two year relationship.
- Boy is trying to wrestle outside of his weight class, figuratively, and faces the frustration of being in between the types of girls that he attracts and then ones that he is attracted to.
- Girl likes boy, but boy is showing most of the signs of interest without asking her on dates.
When I'm interested in someone, and I'm left without the devices of being able to show direct interest, I find myself asking stupid questions all the time. Is she noticing me? When I'm around her, am I being witty? smart? Am I engaging in conversation? How's my social capital? Is my stock up? Do these jeans work with this shirt? Do I have a booger on my face? Does her roommate like me? Do I like her roommate? Am I too honest? Not honest enough?
You get insecure about the dumbest things, and what's worse, you just can't stop thinking about any of it. You know that you shouldn't worry about things over which you can't control and that haven't happened yet, but you can't help but pour over the prospect of the present and the future with that person. I was telling a friend of mine the other night that it's exactly like when you tell a person to not think about an elephant, and then you can't help but think about the elephant.
Only the elephant, in this case, threatens to trample over you both physically and emotionally. This huge creature with a magnetic draw over you get inside of your mind and he just scrambles your brain, rendering you otherwise useless.
But then sometimes you get the carrot and everything seems worth it. Here's to finding something lasting!